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Sexuality Education in Life Orientation Scripted Lesson Plans Grade 11 Learner Book

Sexuality Education in Life Orientation Scripted Lesson Plans Grade 11 Learner Book

TABLE OF CONTENTS BACKGROUND AND CONTEXT FOR THE GRADE 11 SLPs 4 Lesson 11.1 7 My priorities and life goals Lesson 11.2 20 Healthy relationships: choosing the right influences Lesson 11.3 33 Healthy and unhealthy relationships and the media Lesson11.4 40 Living a balanced lifestyle, staying in control Lesson 11.5 50 Understanding the consequences of risky behaviour Lesson 11.6 59 Positive role models Lesson 11.7 69 Gender, power and violence Lesson 11.8 80 Rape – Prevention, support and change Lesson 11.9 90 Taking action against abuse BIBLIOGRAPHY 102

Learner Book: Grade 11 BACKGROUND AND CONTEXT FOR THE GRADE 11 SLPs 1. INTRODUCTION 3.9% 14% Young people face many pressures and risks; many of these 9.2% 9.8% are different than the risks adult may have faced when 7% we were younger. HIV and other infections and early and 8.5% 10.7% unintended pregnancy are those we may think of first. But 4.1% HIV Incidence there are many unhealthy pressures around relationships, and influences that come from many sources. Low 7.2% Medium The difficult facts on HIV prevalence highlight the need for High 4% effective Sexual and Reproductive Health (SRH) education Source: SANAC, accessed January 18, 2019 so that young people will be well equipped to deal with today’s challenges. Figure 1: HIV prevalence by province, 2016 36% HIV is everyone’s problem. 32% 28% 29% 28% No matter where we live in South Africa, everyone is 26% Males affected or at risk in some way. Working together to Females 20% break the silence, show compassion, support those on 17% 17% 16% 16% treatment, and address risks, are the only way to stop 13% 15% the epidemic.1 10% 6% 5% 6% 5% HIV :2 While all young people are at risk, girls are 2% 2% 1% 2% getting infected with HIV at higher rates than boys. This 0-14 15-19 20-24 25-29 30-34 35-39 40-44 45-49 50-54 55-59 60+ trend continues through young adulthood. Figure 2: HIV infection rate by age 2. PURPOSE The Scripted Lesson Plans (SLPs) include comprehensive lessons or activities, with assessment tasks, that will help you to understand the concepts, content, values and attitudes related to sexuality. The lessons encourage you to think about the kind of behaviour and attitudes that lead to a safe and healthy lifestyle. The aim of the activities is to provide you with accurate (true) information on many issues or questions that young people have, or about decisions that young people face regarding their sexual health and well-being. The activities are practical and interesting for you to try. The activities are done individually, in pairs or in groups so that you can share information and have discussions with your peers. Some of the tasks require that you have discussions with your parents, guardians or another trusted adult who you feel comfortable talking to about sex openly. The activities have assessment tasks that you need to complete. The assessment tasks are engaging and help consolidate new Sexuality Education (SE) content that is included in the lessons. Many assessment tasks require you to reflect on your own understanding and decisions about what is being taught. Through the assessment tasks you are able to consider your own behaviour and make decisions that will bring you 1 Shisana, O., Rehle, T., Simbayi, L.C., Zuma, K., Jooste, S., Zungu, N., Labadarios, D., and Onoya, D. (2014). South African National HIV Prevalence, Incidence and Behaviour Survey, 2012. Cape Town, South Africa: HSRC Press. 2 Ibid 4 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 closer to the behaviour, values and attitudes you think are acceptable and good for you. You can discuss, share, compare and encourage your peers with your responses. Try setting up a group with friends who have thoughts and attitudes similar to yours. This supportive group of friends will encourage you in your decisions, as you will encourage them, and help you to build a safe environment in which you will feel free to talk about difficult issues in a trusting, positive and open way. In the earlier grades, activities required that you identify your goals. Setting goals comes with choosing how you will live a healthy lifestyle, which includes a healthy sexual and reproductive life. In Grades 10 to 12, the SLPs will help you determine if your goals need to change, if you need to develop new goals, which behaviour, values and attitudes are best to support your goals and what should you put in place to ensure that you sustain a healthy, well-balanced life in the future 3. STRUCTURE Each part of the SLPs is important and has a specific purpose. Please refer to the diagram below: OPPORTUNITIES to build good knowledge, TIME healthy values and attitudes, to reflect and think and encourage good about your decisions decision-making about safe and choices. and healthy sexuality. READINGS AND WORKSHEETS give you the content and activities for you to do individually, in pairs or in groups. ASSESSMENT TASKS & TEST YOUR CONTENT KNOWLEDGE that gives you factual, allow you to measure reliable information what you have learned and truths about SE. and build on your APPLICATION knowledge. OF WHAT YOU LEARN so that you change your behaviour when and if you need to do so. A GLOSSARY A chance to SHARE of new terms, concepts with your parents, and words for you to siblings, or guardian learn and use, even in what you feel, think and other subjects. choose for yourself. Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 5 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 4. THE CORE MESSAGES The following have been selected as CORE MESSAGES to be reinforced throughout the activities. Use these messages to remind yourself and your peers of what you should know about choosing a safe and healthy sex life. Use them on postcards, bookmarks, posters, bumper stickers etc. to raise awareness and show what you choose to do! 1. I will choose if, and when, to have sex and when not to. 2. I have the right to say “no” and the responsibility to respect “no” to sexual attention and sex at any time and in any situation. 3. If my partner and I choose to have sex, my partner and I will use a condom correctly every time. 4. To protect myself and others, I need to be honest and communicate well in sexual relationships. 5. I respect my own and others’ wellbeing. 6. I know my HIV and STI and general sexual and reproductive health status. 7. My partner and I are equally responsible for preventing pregnancy, HIV and other STIs. 8. I want to be part of a community that stops gender harm and violence and creates safety and peace in its place. 5. KEY TO ICONS A set of icons is included to guide you on different parts of the activity 6 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Lesson 11.1 My priorities and life goals Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 7 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Lesson 11.1 My priorities and life goals Brief Lesson Summary During this lesson, learners will link their priorities and goals to the choices they make now and for the future, with particular attention to their values around sexual and reproductive health (SRH). Activities will help learners to consolidate and deepen their reflection on their goals and how to achieve them. They will do this both on their own and with peers, family and friends. Key Points 1. Goals give you the focus and sense of purpose necessary to pursue your dreams. 2. Our lives are filled with things that take up our time. Some will: • Seem necessary or enjoyable in the moment. • Seem important but may not take us toward our goal. • Help us to make progress toward our goals. 3. Once you have set your goals, you will be able to set your priorities (decide what is most important), and then manage your time to achieve your life’s goals. 4. Your reproductive goals should be considered among your life goals – deciding if and when you want children, how many children, and under what personal circumstances. For example, would you want to have children in a marriage/committed relationship, when you are economically secure, etc.)? 5. If you are in a relationship and are sexually active, then using a contraceptive as well as condoms should be a priority while you pursue your life goals. 6. Your priorities will play a role in deciding how you spend your time. This means balancing your time to spend on relationships with peers and romantic interests, and time needed to pursue the goals you have set for yourself. You will need to consider these questions: • How important is this relationship right now? • What would a pregnancy mean in my life? What would happen if I got a sexually transmitted infection (STI)? • Is this a healthy and happy relationship for me, based on respect for my goals in life? 8 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 ACTIVITIES Activity A: Our priorities, goals and action plans Introduction: This activity will help you reflect on your interests, values and skills, and to set goals. These goals are for the short, medium and long term, and include not only academic and work related goals but personal goals as well. This includes things like relationships, marriage and starting a family. It will also help you think about how SRH issues, such as early or unexpected pregnancy, can impact one’s goals and plans. Lastly, you will reflect on how you spend your time and how you can prioritise better, to be able to reach your goals. 1. Welcome to your first sexuality education lesson of the year. You are going to start by identifying our goals. You will first reflect back on previous goals, and then through a process of identifying and prioritising your interests and values, create new goals related to your academic, professional and personal lives. While doing this, it will be important to consider your Sexual and Reproductive Health (SRH) lives. Relationships, pregnancy, marriage and sexually transmitted infections (STIs) can affect goals that we set for ourselves in both positive and negative ways. Having a healthy relationship with a partner, getting married and starting a family are all goals, like any other goals. 2. Remind yourself what ‘SMART’ letters signify. Share one or two goals from last year with a partner. You should discuss whether or not you have achieved your goals, whether you are still working towards achieving them, or whether you need to change your goals to reflect your current interests or situation. Share your responses with the class. 3. As time goes by, we have new life experiences, and grow and develop. As this happens, we may have achieved our goals or we may have needed to revise them to meet our current interests, values and skills. We also have goals related to relationships, marriage and having children. You are now going to identify your interests, skills and values to help you set new goals for the year. You will consider three categories: academic, professional and personal. Personal includes anything related to our lives outside of school or work such as recreation, SRH, family and community. 4. Brainstorm a few examples for each category. For example, an academic value could be to finish secondary school. A professional interest could be to work in a job where one uses one’s hands. A personal interest could be to be in a committed relationship. Turn to Worksheet 11.1.1: What is important to me? - values, interests and skills. Fill in the table according to your own interests, values and skills for each of the 3 categories. 5. You are now going to choose the top 3 items in each of the categories (academic, professional and personal) that are most important to you. You should circle them. Keep in mind that it is important to have a balance between personal life and academic and professional interests. Share your results with a partner and discuss how to balance things like marriage and having children with professional or academic interests. Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 9 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 6. Think about how you currently spend your time. You should make a list in Worksheet 11.1.2: How do I spend time? You should include all types of activities, from studying, to spending time with a romantic partner. How do you imagine spending your time over the next year, given the list of your most important values, skills and interests related to your academic, professional and personal lives? You should add to the list of How do I spend time? as needed. You will begin to think about prioritising your time by doing the following: a. Imagine you have been given 100 points. These points represent time. b. Allocate the time points amongst your list of ways you spend your time. This should include not only academic work, but time you spend with friends and romantic partners, socializing in person or through the internet, and social media, etc. You will give the most points to the activity you want to spend most time on. Write the number of points next to each item. This will help you prioritise how you spend your time. c. Get into pairs and take turns to explain your time budget to each other. Give each other advice on how you can balance your personal (relationships, entertainment, etc.), academic and professional interests, values and skills. 7. Share what you learnt about yourselves and each other from doing sharing in pairs. You will now take it to the next step of developing goals. You will work independently but can remain in pairs to assist one another as needed. 8. Turn to Worksheet 11.1.3: Goals and Action Plans. From the values, interests and skills you have given the most points to and circled in 11.1.1, you should write goals for the short, medium and long term. Short term goals are those that are accomplished in 6 months – 2 years, medium term goals are goals set for 2 – 5 years, and long terms goals are goals for 5 – 10 years from now. Choose at least one academic, one professional and one personal priority. Discuss how early pregnancy or marriage might affect reaching your goals within the short, medium and long term. For example, if someone wants to finish high school in the next 2 years but becomes pregnant, she could potentially have to leave school and be delayed in finishing her education. 9. You should develop an action plan to lay out the steps to take in order to achieve a particular goal. You should think about a timeline for the steps you will take and list any resources that will be needed. You should also think of obstacles or challenges you might run into along the way and how to overcome them. Finally, you should think about how relationships and parenthood also fit in to your plans. 10. The recipe for achieving a goal can be captured in 4 Ps: plan, problem solve, persevere and persist. Following the 4 P’s will help you succeed in reaching your goals, give you a sense of achievement and a self confidence boost. Remember that achieving a balance is important. Academic work and other kinds of work need to be balanced by what is important to you in your personal lives, including family and SRH. 10 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 11. Turn to Worksheet 11.1.4: What is important to me right now, and think about the general priority areas in your lives right now. You should share your results with a partner. 12. What have you gained from doing the different parts of this activity? Do you think you will leave the class today with more certainty about your priorities, goals, and the way forward? HOMEWORK 4. Go through the homework and pay attention to Reading 11.1.1: Xolani and Sam. Do this homework together with a classmate, a friend, or someone at home who is your age or older by reading the story together and discussing the questions. In this story, the relationship between the two characters is a heterosexual one. However, the same considerations, risks and reasons to prioritise SRH, apply to homosexual relationships. CONSOLIDATION This lesson has reviewed goal setting that you have been doing since Grade 7, but it has looked at goal setting from a SRH angle as well. You have identified your interests, values and skills in your academic, professional and personal lives, and identified some short, medium and long term goals. You reflected on how relationships, marriage and having children are goals in and of themselves, and how you can also affect other short, medium and long term goals if they are not planned. Read over the Core Messages again, and consider if any of them ‘spoke’ to the content you have covered in this lesson? Core Messages • I will choose if, and when, to have sex and when not to. • I have the right to say “no” to sexual attention and sex at any time. I also have the responsibility to respect “no” for an answer. • If we choose to have sex, my partner and I will use a condom correctly every time. ASSESSMENT 1. Use the activity on Worksheet 11.1.3: Goals and Action Plans as an assessment task. Develop short, medium and long term goals and action plans for your goals. You will revisit these goals throughout the year and may want to adjust your action plans. You may even start rethinking your goals once the class discussions have happened and you hear from your peers about your goals and plans. The longer term goals will help you think about your longer term choices, even once you have completed your schooling. If you choose to, you may read your goals and actions to the rest of the class, and get feedback from your peers. Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 11 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 RESOURCES/MATERIALS Worksheet 11.1.1: What is important to me? - values, interests and skills 1. Fill in the table according to your own interests, values and skills for each of the three categories. 2. Circle the 3 items that you give the most points to in each of the categories that are most important to you. 3. Think about how you will balance the items listed across the 3 categories. For example, you might want to start your own business but also want to start having a family. Academic Professional Personal e.g. Completing my education e.g. Working with my hands e.g. Being in a committed relationship 12 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Worksheet 11.1.2: How do I spend my time? 1. Make a list of how you typically spend your time during the day using the table below. Include all types of activities from studying to time socializing in person or by phone or on social media, as well as time you may spend with a romantic partner. 2. Reflect on the 9 most important values, skills and interests you circled in the previous exercise. Now think about how you feel you should be spending your time to incorporate these important things into your life. Add to the list below as needed. You are given 100 points. These points represent time. Allocate time points amongst the items in your list below. The more points you give, the more time you think is necessary to spend on that activity. Write the number of points next to each item. Don’t go over 100 points! This will help you prioritise how you spend your time. Remember it is important to be able to balance time spent on academic work or other kinds of work, with time for personal activities, like spending time with a romantic partner for example. Type of activity Time Points Activity (academic, work, (total=100) personal) Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 13 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Worksheet 11.1.3: Goals and action plans Short-term goals Medium-term goals Long-term goals Things I want to achieve Things I want to achieve in 2 - 5 Things I want to achieve in 5 - 10 within 6 months – 2 years years’ time years’ time 14 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Develop an action plan to reach your goals! 1. Write one goal each for your academic, professional and personal interests and values. 2. Identify what steps you will need to take to arrive at your goal. 3. Set a deadline for achieving each step. 4. Identify any resources you might need to take each step. Short-term goal (6 months to 2 years): Steps By when Resources Challenges to How relationships needed overcome and parenthood fit in 1. 2. 3. Medium-term goal (2 years to 5 years): Steps By when Resources Challenges to How relationships needed overcome and parenthood fit in 1. 2. 3. Long-term goal: Steps By when Resources Challenges to How relationships needed overcome and parenthood fit in 1. 2. 3. Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 15 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Worksheet 11.1.4: What is important to me right now? Rank the following areas according to how important they are to you in your life right now. 1 = high priority 2 = important 3 = not that important 4 = not important at all 5 = don’t think it will ever be important to me Link to my goals What is important to me right now? Rank (short, medium or long term) Family Friends Having a baby Get married / having a lifelong partner Finishing school Career choice Sexual and Reproductive Health (SRH) and well- being 16 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 HOMEWORK Reading 11.1.1: Xolani and Sam Find someone your age or older with whom to do this homework activity. Read the story about Xolani and Sam. Then discuss the questions together. My future is bright Xolani is in grade 11. She is in a romantic relationship with Sam who is the same grade. The relationship is new and exciting. Xolani knows that Sam lives with his older sister who works shifts in a factory. Sometimes Sam’s sister is away during the day. Sometimes she is away during the night. Sam told Xolani that he wants to matriculate with good marks so he can continue his education in engineering. Xolani tells Sam that she has decided that she wants to become a paramedic or perhaps even study in the health sciences. One day they go to Sam’s house after school to hang out. His sister is working at the factory. Sam and Xolani begin to kiss. Things progress quickly and soon they are in the bedroom and begin to have unprotected sex… (FREEZE THE MOMENT) Now think and discuss: 1. What do you think happens next? Write 2 scenarios: one where they continue to have unprotected sex and another where they stop and discuss what is happening and what they should do. 2. For each scenario, how do you think Xolani and Sam’s actions could affect their future plans to do well in school and continue with further studies? 3. What advice do you have for Xolani and Sam so they can have a healthy relationship and reach their goals? Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 17 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 GLOSSARY Career goals: What you would like to do with your life in the future; having a vision for further education and the work you will do. Goal-setting (short, medium and long term): Identifying what you are aiming to achieve now (short term), in the next 2-5 years (medium term), and 5-10 years, or even longer (long term). Life goals: What your aims are for family, relationships, partnership/marriage, parenting, and career choices. Personal values: Should determine how you set your goals and priorities. When your actions match your values, life feels on track. But when these do not align well with your personal values, things will feel wrong or off-track. Priorities: The things that are most important to us. When we set our priorities, we are laying the foundation which enable us to make progress toward our goals. Sexual and reproductive health (SRH) goals: Decisions about how to take care of one’s SRH. For example, a person is in an romantic relationship will need to consider whether they will want a long-term and committed relationship, and how children would fit in to the picture. Setting reproductive goals requires you to consider if, and when, you want children, how many children you want, and how long you want to wait in between children having children. Time management: Managing time in order to achieve certain outcomes. It is easy to let our time become filled with things that may seem interesting or necessary, but often we fill up our time with things that don’t help us make progress toward our goals. By being aware of our priorities, we can make more purposeful decisions about how we use time. 18 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Here is a directory of services that you could consult should you need to call for support. The numbers are for the national call centres. Call and ask for the number for your local services. They will refer you to the appropriate centre in your province or region. PLACES THAT HELP A directory on services that can be approached for support Department of Social Development Gender-based Violence Call Centre: 0800 428 428 Dial *120*7867# (free from any cell phone). All child/gender-related violence and abuse questions and help for victims. Social workers available to assist. Stop Gender Violence Helpline: 0800 150 150 Childline: 0800 055 555 Lifeline South Africa: Free confidential telephone counselling services. 0861 322 322 www.lifeline. org.za Thuthuzela Care Centres: Find out if there is a Thuthuzela care centre in your area. For a list of TCCs visit the website http://isssasa.org.za/care-centres Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 19 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Lesson 11.2 Healthy relationships: choosing the right influences 20 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Lesson 11.2 Healthy relationships: choosing the right influences Brief Lesson Summary In this lesson, learners will think critically about the ingredients of healthy relationships and relationships that are harmful to their well-being. Learners will examine relationships across five main categories of relationships, and discuss the rights and responsibilities that are part of healthy relationships. Learners will reflect on and identify relationships that are potentially harmful to their well-being. They will work with their peers to examine what makes these relationships unhealthy or risky. There is a particular focus on relationships with a big age difference between partners, and the power dynamics that occur when gifts and other benefits are expected (transactional relationships) in exchange for sex. These ideas are directly linked to South Africa’s current HIV epidemic, and the factors that place young people, and particularly young women, at risk. For homework, learners will identify what they personally want for their relationships, and set limits for firm expectations from romantic relationships. These could be applied to different types of relationships but the focus in this lesson is on romantic/sexual relationships. Key Points 1. We have the power to pursue healthy relationships through the choices we make. It is not easy. Sometimes we must make difficult choices for our own well-being. 2. Social and cultural norms influence our identity and can play a positive role in our lives, but when they keep us from fulfilling our potential, or lead to hurtful attitudes toward others, they are harmful. 3. Not all relationships are healthy; some may be harmful to the well-being of one or both partners. 4. We must think critically about the risks of starting a relationship with someone who is older than were are, particularly if they are married, and/or offering money, gifts or other support in exchange for a sexual relationship. 5. It is critical that we understand for ourselves and raise our own awareness, as well as the awareness of others, about risky relationships and the role they play in the spread of HIV in South Africa. 6. Understanding the power dynamics in a romantic relationship is critical in order to take actions to protect ourselves. 7. It is important for us to identify our own values and expectations for relationships of different kinds, and what is non-negotiable for us in a relationship. Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 21 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 ACTIVITIES Activity A: What makes our relationships healthy and satisfying? Introduction: In this first activity you will be discussing what makes relationships healthy and satisfying. Healthy relationships will be discussed in regard to 5 categories of relationships: friends and peers, parents or guardian/caregiver, romantic relationships, work relationships, and relationships with educators. This activity will also guide you to an exercise where you will discuss the rights and responsibilities that can make up healthy relationships. 1. Look at the illustration above and consider the different kinds of relationships represented there. 2. Divide into 5 groups. Each group will get one of the 5 categories of relationships: friends and peers, parents or guardian/caregiver, romantic relationships, work relationships, and relationships with educators. 3. Make a list of what you think is necessary to have healthy and positive relationships, firstly, as individuals and secondly, within the category of relationship assigned to your group. For example, what is needed for you to have a healthy relationship with your peers? Or, what is needed for you to have a healthy relationship with your romantic partner? 4. Appoint a spokesperson who will report back to the class (in 1 minute or less) on the 2 most important items on your list. Spokespersons will report back to the class, and common priorities that emerge across the groups will be highlighted by you and your educator. 5. Refer to Reading 11.2.1: What makes healthy relationships in your Learner Books. In relationships we all have certain rights and responsibilities that need to be respected for the relationship to be successful. Turn to the person sitting next to you and read through the two boxes on rights and responsibilities. You can choose as many rights and responsibilities as you like that you think are very important in relationships. 22 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 6. Remember that all relationships can benefit from awareness and improvement but in this case we are focusing on romantic relationships. With the rights and responsibilities boxes in mind from Reading 11.2.1, discuss the following, if you feel comfortable doing so: a. How would you explain what an intimate relationship is? b. Are all romantic relationships intimate? And are all intimate relationships necessarily romantic relationships? c. How well do these lists in Reading 11.2.1 reflect your current or past romantic relationships? d. What steps can you take to be a more respectful and supportive boyfriend/girlfriend? e. If you are in a relationship, are there any social or cultural norms that prevent you from respecting rights and honouring responsibilities in your relationship? Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 23 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Activity B: Relationships and risk Introduction: This activity includes a serious conversation about risky relationships that may have harmful consequences in our lives. You will first look at the issue of South Africa’s HIV epidemic and discuss how HIV rates can be linked to risky relationships. This activity will specifically focus on transactional relationships and explore how this type of relationship may look appealing to some people but that the consequences can be risky and harmful. 1. It is important to consider what makes up healthy relationships. We also need to consider what can make some relationships risky or harmful to our wellbeing. We all want – and are excited by – good, healthy relationships. Many of us imagine ourselves one day being in long-lasting, safe romantic relationships. But not all romantic relationships are healthy ones. You will have a serious discussion about South Africa’s HIV epidemic, and why it continues despite our gains in prevention and care. This discussion may relate to people you know, or even to yourselves, which might make it hard to think about. But this is something we must all be aware of and consider without judgment or blame toward ourselves or others. Refer to Reading 11.2.2: Understanding relationships and the HIV epidemic in South Africa in your Learner Books. Take a few minutes to read, and then discuss: • What thoughts do you have about what this picture and these statistics are telling us? • Look at the numbers – what do you notice about differences between males and females? And between the age groups? • Why do you think girls get infected at a higher rate than boys? What role do age differences between partners play in this? What social or cultural views may influence this? Share some ideas aloud with the class. It is important to note that supporting each other (peer support) to resist unsafe relationships is a major step you can all take to break the pattern of the spread of HIV in South Africa. 2. Give some examples of relationships that have the potential to be unhealthy or harmful to one’s well- being. Take a minute to consider and then share your ideas. What do the following terms mean to you? Most of these are just names people use to describe specific relationships: • Blessers/ Sugar daddies • Intergenerational relationship • Transactional relationship • Friends with benefits • Hooking up • One-night stands 3. Think back to the points made in Reading 11.2.2: Understanding relationships and the HIV epidemic in South Africa. Are any of the relationships you have outlined, described in the reading? Which ones? 4. We’ll focus now on one type of relationship – transactional relationships. Without looking ahead, what does transactional relationships/sex mean to you? 24 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 3 Transactional relationship 3 Blessers, Sugar daddies, transactional relationships - these are some of the ways to describe the same thing. Transactional relationships occur when money, gifts or favours are given or expected in exchange for sex. This type of relationship is different from commercial sex, where there is agreement about a planned financial exchange. Relationships between blessers and their blessees usually involve older people having a relationship with a much younger person... With this kind of relationship, generally, the person with the resources (‘the ‘blesser’) has more power in the relationship than the ‘blessee’. 5. Some relationships can bring benefits, such as money, gifts, other rewards, or even social status, but the power dynamic in these relationships are usually not equal. They are often risky, especially when one person is much younger than the other. Relationships start for many reasons and life is often complicated and pressures people to form relationships that do not feel healthy or safe. Remember that our purpose here is not to judge, but rather to focus on helping each other to have the safest possible relationships, and avoid those that have the potential to be unhealthy, either because of the way in which one or the other partner is treated, or because the relationship brings certain risks with it. 3 Adapted from: http://www.mtvshuga.com/knowledge/transactional-sex/ Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 25 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Activity C: Critical Thinking and Relationships Introduction: This activity will allow you to think critically about risky relationships. The exercise involves a series of questions that will help you evaluate a specific type of relationship and develop a strategy for leaving a relationship that is not healthy for you. 1. Turn to Worksheet 11.2.1: Critical thinking about risky relationships. In your groups, you will think critically about common relationships that have the potential to be unhealthy. Take the following steps: a. Identify a risky relationship scenario that you would like to analyse, based on the discussions in today’s lesson. You have 2 minutes. b. Your groups should appoint a facilitator and note taker, and, if called upon, be prepared to report back to the class on your responses to the questions in the worksheet. You have 1 minute. c. You will analyse questions related to the risky relationship you have selected within the worksheet. You have 5 minutes. d. If there is time, each group will have the chance to share responses from your worksheet. If there is not enough time for each group to share, your educator will make a selection for feedback, based on the different types of relationships. e. What are the ideas or themes that the groups had in common? Note with your class ideas that seem particularly important about specific types of relationships. Many of us hope for healthy romantic relationships, either now or in the future. We hope for relationships where there is mutual respect, with actions that show that respect, as well as words. However, not all relationships are like that and some have serious risks, such as the risk of contracting HIV. If you find yourselves in risky relationships, you should find a trusted adult or friend to speak to, who can help you take the necessary steps to get out of the relationship. CONSOLIDATION In consolidating your lesson, review the key points. Remember that we each have the power to pursue healthy relationships, but do this requires wanting the very best for ourselves and being willing to do the work to achieve this. We know that not all relationships are healthy. It is important to think critically about the risks of getting into certain types of relationships. It is always important to know ourselves, to understand who we are, what our values are, and what we expect from relationships. We need to be clear about our ‘non- negotiable’ requirements in relationships. Think over the core messages of this lesson. Core messages 1. I will choose if, and when, to have sex, and when not to. 2. I have the right to say “no” to sexual attention and sex at any time. I also have the responsibility to respect “no” for an answer. 3. To protect myself and others, I need to be honest and communicate well in sexual relationships. 4. I respect my own and others’ wellbeing. 5. I want to be part of a community that stops gender harm and violence and creates safety and peace in its place. 26 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 HOMEWORK 1. In Homework 11.2.1: Relationships, getting what you want, knowing what you need, use the flower to help reflect on healthy relationships and identify what is important for you in relationships. What is most important to me in my relationships? 1. Think about the symbolism of using a flower to represent your relationship. Flowers represent newness, life, new growth, a response from the plant to nurturing conditions. Right in the centre of the flower, the most beautiful and fragile part of the flower is hidden. That centre is only shown off once the flower is sure that the weather will not harm it. 2. Could your relationship be like a flower? 3. The petals of the flower represent what we value and what we need to have healthy, respectful and happy romantic/intimate relationships. You can think about a relationship you are in now if you want to, or you can think about what you would want in such a relationship in the future. 4. The five inner petals, that are a darker color, are closest to your heart and head (values and beliefs) and are non-negotiable for you. For example, if open and honest communication is a top priority for you, write that in one of the 5 inner petals. The five outer petals, that are the lighter color, are other important values and needs but not as important as the top 5. 5. Reflect on your relationship. Think about what is important to you in your relationship. Then consider against each of the things you want what it is that you need to be able to give you the relationship that you want.It is possible to have healthy and happy relationships, whether it is with parents, peers or a romantic partner. This will take awareness, and a little bit of work to know who you are and what you value. You should also honour rights and responsibilities that come along with the various relationships in our lives. All of this applies to any type of relationship, no matter your sexual identity. Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 27 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 ASSESSMENT Use the activity in Homework 11.2.1: Relationships, getting what you want, knowing what you need as an assessment task. You can share your responses with a peer. RESOURCES/MATERIALS Reading 11.2.1: What makes healthy relationships?4 1. Introduction: In pairs, read through the two boxes. For both the rights and responsibilities boxes, tell your partner what you think is most important in relationships. Reflect on the two questions listed below with your partner. I have the right to… • Be treated with respect • Be respected for my differences (including • Be in a healthy relationship and feel safe physical, emotional, gender identity, sexuality, cultural identity, religious beliefs) • Determine my own values and set limits • Resolve differences constructively • Say “No” when I want to • Enjoy friends and activities apart from my • Not be hurt or abused in any way (not romantic partner physically, sexually or emotionally) • Leave or stay in a relationship • Be myself and express myself honestly • Decide what I share with whom • Decide when I get married I have the responsibility to… • Treat others with respect, no matter how • Compromise when needed different another person may be from me • Admit to being wrong when appropriate • Treat myself with respect • Ask for help from friends, family and • Communicate my values and interests mentors • Communicate clearly, honestly and • Give my romantic partner space to enjoy respectfully activities and friendships outside of our • Listen attentively and with an open mind relationship • Resolve differences without violence and • Never exert power or control in a humiliation relationship • Never abuse — not physically, sexually or emotionally 4 Adapted from: http://www.respectme.org.au/relationship-rights-responsibilities/ and http://www.chooserespect.org.au/code_ of_behaviour.html 28 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 2. Once you have reviewed the rights and responsibilities boxes, discuss the following two questions, if you feel comfortable doing so: ÎÎ How well do these lists reflect your current or past intimate relationships? ÎÎ What steps can you take to be a more respectful and supportive boyfriend/girlfriend? ÎÎ If you are in a relationship, are there any social or cultural norms that prevent you from respecting rights and honouring responsibilities in your relationships? Reading: 11.2.2: Understanding relationships and the HIV epidemic in South Africa5 36% Illustration 11.2.2: 32% Infections of males and 28% 29% 28% females by age group5 26% Males Females South Africa has the highest 20% number of estimated new HIV 17% 17% 16% 16% infections globally. While all 13% 15% young people are at risk, young 10% women 15-24 are getting infected with HIV at much 6% 5% 6% 5% higher rates than boys (2,363 2% 2% 2% 1% per week). This trend continues through young adulthood. 0-14 15-19 20-24 25-29 30-34 35-39 40-44 45-49 50-54 55-59 60+ Illustration 11.2.2: Intergenerational sex and risk cycle6 5 Shisana, O.; Rehle, T.; Simbayi, LC; Zuma, K.; Jooste, S.; Zungu, N.; Labadarios, D.; Onoya, D. et al., (2014) South African National HIV Prevalence, Incidence and Behaviour Survey, 2012. Cape Town: HSRC Press 6 De Oliveira, T. and Kharsany, A. et al., Transmission networks and risk of HIV infection in KwaZulu-Natal, South Africa: a community-wide phylogenetic study. Lancet HIV 2017; 4: e41–50 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 29 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 There are many reasons for these differences. Age difference is a major factor in South Africa – specifically relationships between older men and young women / girls. Experts agree that understanding and addressing this cycle is critical for stopping the further spread of HIV in South Africa. An estimated 1 in every 3 (33.7%) sexually active adolescent girls is involved in a sexual relationship with a sexual partner more than five years older. This compares to only 4.1% of adolescent boys who report the same behaviour. Worksheet 11.2.1: Critical thinking about risky relationships Instructions: Analyse the following questions as a group, based on the type of relationship you choose. Choose from the following list: • Blessers / Sugar daddies • Intergenerational relationship • Transactional relationship • Friends with benefits • Hooking up • One-night stand Our group is discussing this type of relationship: What types of social or cultural norms support and discourage this type of relationship? Could there be harmful consequences to ones’ well-being if one isn’t this type of relationship? Why or why not? Are girls and young women or boys and young men more likely to experience negative consequences from being in this type of relationship? Why? Are the power dynamics equal in this relationship? If not, who holds the power? If someone found him or herself in this type of relationship, what are his/her rights and responsibilities? If someone found her or himself in this relationship and didn’t want to be in the relationship anymore, what could she/ he do to leave the relationship? 30 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Homework 11.2.1: Relationships, getting what you want, knowing what you need Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 31 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 GLOSSARY Critical thinking: Objective analysis and evaluation of an issue or situation in order to form a judgment or make a decision. We use critical thinking to analyse a situation and make well thought through decisions Cultural norms: Attitudes and ways of behaving that are considered normal or typical by a group of people. Healthy relationships: All relationships are different and there are no specific features or qualities that define a healthy relationship. However, healthy relationships are built on qualities such as trust, respect, honesty and support, and they are not harmful to us. Intergenerational relationship: A relationship between people of different generations, where there is a large age difference between two partners. While age differences are more common in later adult years, when younger people are in relationships with much older people, there are often risks associated with the relationship. Mutual respect: When two people demonstrate that they value and admire one another, respect one another’s rights and their points of view. With mutual respect, you respect the other person’s feelings as well as their rights Power dynamics: The balance of control or influence in a situation involving two or more people. When one person or a group of people have more power than others, this undermines the person or group with less power. In a relationship between two people, if power is unequally shared, the person with less power may be prevented from demanding a safe, kind and supportive relationship. Responsibilities: A responsibility is an obligation to think and behave in a way that is respectful, healthy and for the benefit of oneself and the person or people one is in relationship with. Rights A moral or legal entitlement to be treated with respect and dignity – and to treat others in this way. Our Constitution sets out the rights held by citizens of South Africa. Social norms: Attitudes or patterns of behaviour among groups of people that are considered acceptable and influence the way the group thinks and behaves. Transactional relationships / Transactional sex: A relationship where an exchange occurs for sex, such as money, gifts or favours. Unhealthy relationship: A relationship that is not kind or respectful and does not create a context that is conducive to individual self-fulfilment or well-being. 32 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Lesson 11.3 Healthy and unhealthy relationships and the media Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 33 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Lesson 11.3 Healthy and unhealthy relationships and the media Brief Lesson Summary In this lesson, learners will be encouraged to think critically about the way that the media influences their values and beliefs about relationships. The lesson begins with an activity that explores the influence of media in general on personal relationships, and continues in the next activity to consider the positive and negative effects of social media in learners’ lives and relationships. In the final activity, learners will reflect on an example of a personal advertisement for a transactional relationship, found on social media. They will consider the possibility of negative consequences that could result in engaging in that type of relationship. Finally, learners will continue to reflect on what they want for their own relationships in a homework assignment that encourages them to evaluate the positive and the potentially negative side effects of social media on their relationships, and ways in which they can protect themselves and others while using social media. KEY POINTS 1. It is important to consider if the media we engage with on a regular basis is negatively influencing our values and beliefs about our relationships. 2. Various forms of social media can have positive or negative influences on our lives. We need to consider carefully if our behavior on social media is putting us at risk. 3. We should be aware that adverts related to transactional sex relationships are common on social media. We should be able to recognise them and consider the risk involved in engaging in that type of relationship. ACTIVITIES Activity A: The influence of media on our values and beliefs about relationships Introduction: In this activity you will explore the influence of media on your personal relationships. Be open to the views and opinions of your peers, and to use the discussion to understand why media messages have different influences on us. Most of us interact daily with different forms of media and whether we realise it or not, this has an impact on our values and beliefs about relationships. It is important to consider for yourselves if the media we engage with is negatively influencing our values and beliefs about relationships. For example, are the shows you watch, the music you listen to, or the advertisements you see marketing a type of romantic relationship that has an unequal power dynamic? Or are they selling a type of dating relationship that could be harmful to someone’s well-being? If the answer is ‘yes’ to these questions, you should consider the negative influence media may be having on your own values and beliefs about your relationships. 34 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 1. To begin this activity, form a small group of a few leaners sitting near you. You will remain in your group for activities A and B. 2. Different media messages, including advertisements, radio shows, music videos, TV shows, movies – and more, are used to promote or sell ideas on a range of topics. Not all messaging is positive, and neither is all messaging negative. We interpret media messages based on what appeals to us and/or what we imagine is good for us. You can volunteer to: a. Give an example of positive messaging that you have seen in the media recently and explain why you think it is positive. b. Give an example of negative messaging that you have seen in the media recently and to explain why you think it is negative. 3. Your educator will show you some images, and will ask you to each share what the messaging in each example means to you with your group. A note taker in your group should write down key words used in each person’s interpretation. Take a few minutes to discuss. 4. Come back together and discuss the following questions as a class: Did you understand the message in the same way? How were your interpretations different? In what ways do the media influence our ideas about relationships? What does the image suggest about the relationships between the people involved, and the feelings they have for each other? Is there anything that suggests that one person has more influence or power in the relationship than the other? 5. Do you have other ideas or examples of the influence of media on your expectations of relationships? Are these positive or negative? Do the examples you identify honour the rights of others in relationships? 6. Consider the core messages for Grade 11 – what is missing from what we are seeing in the media to support these messages? What advice would you have for a younger person looking at TV, movies or a video? Activity B: Social media and relationships Introduction: In this activity, you will explore the effects of social media on your relationships. Social media is used in many ways by young people. It is important to know that social media can be used constructively, or in ways that can cause harm to ourselves or to others. You will spend time discussing both effects in this activity. 1. Social media can have a strong influence on our relationships in the current times. Whether you have first-hand experience with social media, or are just aware of it from hearing about it from others, your perspectives will be valuable for this discussion. You should remain in your groups for this activity. 2. What forms of social media are most commonly used by you and your friends? Discuss in your group, with one learner per group jotting down some notes: What are some ways that social media can be used positively and constructively? Share your ideas. 3. There are risks associated with social media – for ourselves and for others as well. In groups, share some of the social media you either use or are aware of. What should you be concerned about for your own protection on social media? What are some ways that social media could hurt another person (with or without meaning to)? What examples of this have you seen or heard about? Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 35 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 4. Share what was discussed in your group. Consider the illustrations in Illustrations 11.3.1: Positive and Negative Social Media. Discuss together as a full group whether you have experienced or seen similar things and write your own responses to the illustrations. Activity C: Personal Ads and Social Media Introduction: This activity explores transactional sex and social media. As social media gains more influence over our lives, it is important to draw attention to the ways in which learners can be drawn into risky or harmful relationships through social media. You may already have experienced risky or harmful relationships. But, it is important to remember that positive, supportive peer relationships, as well as relationships with a trusted adult, can be protective factors in our lives. 1. Remember what was discussed in the lesson 11.2 – relationships that contribute to or are harmful to our well-being. As part of this lesson you will discuss transactional sex and social media. Read the description of transactional sex as a reminder. 78 NOTE TO THE LEARNER 7 ‘Blessers’, ‘Sugar daddies’, ‘transactional sex’ - these are some of the ways to describe the same kind of relationship. Transactional sex occurs when money, gifts, or favours are given or expected in exchange for sex. This type of relationship is different from commercial sex, where there is an agreement about exchanging sex for money. Relationships between blessers and their blessees usually involve older individuals with younger people. With this arrangement, often the person with the resources has more power in the relationship than the person who is the ‘blessee’. Transactional sex, and transactional relationships with unequal power, have the potential to be unhealthy or harmful to one’s well-being. 2. Read aloud the ‘Wanted…’ personal ad that could be found on various forms of social media or other forms of media: Wanted…..I am a 40 year old guy. I am a fun loving and outgoing person and I am married. I have my own business. I need a blessee around 17 to 20 years old. She must be tall, slender, and very sexy… and must understand that I am married. She should love sex because I am a very sexual person and, and should be adventurous. I will bless her with anything her heart desires.8 7 Adapted from: http://www.mtvshuga.com/knowledge/transactional-sex/ 8 Adapted from: https://www.sbs.com.au/topics/sites/sbs.com.au.topics/files/styles/body_image/public/fb_post_blesser. png?itok=dJWZn4Yh&mtime=1464231945 36 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 3. Refer to Worksheet 11.3.1: Wanted…in your Learner Books. Take some individual time to reflect on the questions and comments listed and write them down. a. Why is the above post an example of transactional sex? b. Are blessees always female and blessers always male? Explain. c. Explain the risk of this type of romantic relationship. d. Explain the risk of meeting a romantic partner over social media. e. Why is it important that we do not judge anyone who chooses or finds themselves in this kind of relationship? 4. Share your answers with a learner sitting near you and go through each question and provide possible additional answers if you can. HOMEWORK Pick a theme related to the hurtful ways social media can be used in dating or romantic relationships, and create a poster that provides guidelines for the use of social media that learners would like their peers to follow. Try to have at least 3 messages that reflect positive use of social media, and 3 that reflect the negative use of social media. This can include suggestions for personal protection, as well as protecting others. This assignment can be done alone or in pairs. Be prepared to show your posters to your class. Themes might include: • Sexting (texting messages and images about sexual relationships) • Transactional relationships/sex • ‘Outing’ personal information such as sexual orientation or past relationships • Revenge pornography • Cyber bullying CONSOLIDATION Consolidate the lesson by reviewing the key points. Go over the core messages for the lesson. Core Messages • I will choose if, and when, to have sex and when not to. • I have the right to say “no” and the responsibility to respect “no” to sexual attention and sex at any time and in any situation. ASSESSMENT Complete and submit the table in the Homework Assignment. You may not want to share some of the information with others in the classroom. This should be respected. Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 37 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 RESOURCES/MATERIALS Illustration 11.3.1: Positive and Negative Social Media Introduction: Discuss with the rest of your class whether you have experienced or seen similar things on social media. Worksheet 11.3.1: Wanted… Introduction: Based on this personal ad below, work individually to answer the following questions in your Learner Books: 9 Wanted…..I am a 40 year old guy. I am a fun loving and outgoing person and I am married. I have my own business. I need a blessee around 17 to 20 years old. She must be tall, slender, and very sexy… and must understand that I am married. She should love sex because I am a very sexual person and, and should be adventurous. I will bless her with anything her heart desires. 1. Why is the above post an example of transactional sex? 2. Are blessees always female and blessers male? Explain. 3. Explain the risk of this type of romantic relationship. 4. Explain the risk of meeting a romantic partner over social media. 5. Why is it important that we do not judge anyone who may choose, or find themselves in this kind of relationship? 9 Adapted from: SBS.co.au. Retrieved: https://www.sbs.com.au/topics/sites/sbs.com.au.topics/files/styles/body_image/public/ fb_post_blesser.png?itok=dJWZn4Yh&mtime=1464231945 38 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 GLOSSARY Beliefs: Beliefs are ideas that we accept as true. We can also believe in a person. When we have trust, faith and confidence in someone or something, we believe in them. Cyber bullying: Using electronic communication, such as the internet and social media, to shame, intimidate, manipulate or threaten someone. Exploitation: When someone takes advantage of another person to meet their own agenda, this is exploitation. In an exploitative relationship, power is not equal. One person has the ability to take advantage of the other person or use them in some way. This often means making them do something they do not want to do, or they do not feel is right. Marketing: The act of promoting or selling products or services. Pornography: Material, such as a book, photographs or a video that shows people having sex. Pornography can be found in the media, social media and in print material. Revenge pornography: Sexually explicit images, made public without the consent of the subject, and with the intention of causing harm to the person in the image. Revenge pornography is often, but not always, disseminated by someone who the subject was in a romantic, relationship with in the past. Sexting: Texting sexual photographs, videos or messages on a mobile phone. Transactional relationships / Transactional sex: A type of relationship where money, gifts or favours are given or expected in exchange for sex. Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 39 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Lesson 11.4 Living a balanced lifestyle, staying in control 40 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Lesson 11.4 Living a balanced lifestyle, staying in control BRIEF LESSON SUMMARY This lesson has two themes. First, you will identify the characteristics of a healthy and balanced lifestyle. You will be building on your prior knowledge that being happy and healthy includes paying attention to all of the interlinked aspects of your unique selves, including your physical, intellectual, emotional, spiritual and social dimensions. You will also explore factors like negative peer pressure that could have an adverse effect on your lifestyle choices, and possibly affect your ability to achieve your goals and dreams. This lesson also provides you with the opportunity to understand how your choices about relationships can influence every dimension of your life. Together, you will discuss what it means to have healthy relationships, so that you are better prepared to make prudent decisions, particularly decisions concerning sexual relationships. You will discuss the importance of ensuring that risky behaviours do not influence the different dimensions of your healthy, balanced lifestyle. This is especially important when you are thinking about engaging in sexual activities. KEY POINTS 1. The physical, emotional, social, intellectual and spiritual dimensions of a human life interact to influence one’s overall well-being. It is important to ensure that the full range of our human needs are met. 2. Seek ways to achieve a healthy and balanced lifestyle to ensure your physical, social, emotional and spiritual well-being. 3. Support and encourage your friends and peers as they also explore and experiment in life, always with a vision and plan for living a balanced life and making healthy choices. 4. Relationships are set up based on the decisions you make for yourself and will influence how you maintain a healthy, balanced lifestyle. Understanding the influence of risky behaviour on all the dimensions of a healthy, balanced lifestyle, helps to make healthy choices about having relationships, especially romantic relationships. 5. I have the right to say “no” to sexual attention and sex at any time. I also have the responsibility to respect “no” for an answer from somebody else. Others’ choices about being sexually active should not influence my decisions about protecting myself from risky behaviours. 6. People who are sexually active should use a condom every single time they have sex to protect themselves from unintended pregnancy, HIV and STIs. Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 41 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 ACTIVITIES Activity A: Balancing our lifestyles Introduction: This activity looks at our physical, intellectual, emotional, spiritual and social well-being. You will identify activities under each of these categories, to assess whether you are leading a balanced and healthy lifestyle and think about the steps you can take to improve your lifestyle. You will also come to understand the interconnectedness between the five categories and how these impact our relationships. 1. What does it mean to lead a balanced lifestyle? 2. What elements of our lives are necessary to have a balanced lifestyle? 3. Look at the table below with the columns for the physical, intellectual, emotional, spiritual and social dimensions of our lives: 1. Physical 2. Intellectual 3. Emotional 4. Spiritual 5. Social 4. What are the ingredients or components of a healthy and balanced lifestyle? 5. Your educator will assist you with some of the ideas that you might have missed. Add notes in the space provided on the table. Note that it is possible to make lifestyle choices that offer multiple benefits toward healthy and balanced living. For example, you may decide to play a sport to improve your fitness. It also expands your circle of friends who share similar interests. 1. You will now do a self-reflection. Refer to Worksheet 11.4.1: My vision for a balanced lifestyle and write down your ideas about what is important for each of us to achieve a balanced lifestyle. 2. Move on to Worksheet 11.4.2: My lifestyle chart. You will now assess how balanced your lifestyle is by rating yourself in the five areas based on what you wrote in Worksheet 11.4.1: My vision for a balanced lifestyle. See the worksheet for instructions. After scoring you should also identify the steps you can take to make your lifestyle more healthy and balanced. 3. Once you have completed the table, do the following in pairs: a. Discuss your rating, and why you rated yourself the way you did. b. Share ideas on how you can pursue a more healthy and balanced lifestyle through the choices you make. c. Discuss how adding or changing activities in these five areas of your life may affect your relationships with romantic partners, family members and friends. 4. After your discussion, take a moment to think about which areas you felt confident in, and which areas you felt less confident in, or needed to give more attention to. 42 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 5. As you conclude this activity remember the following points: a. All of the five areas are interconnected and affect the way we view ourselves and interact with oth- ers. b. There are important connections between our physical well-being and our mental health. For example, if you are very depressed, this may affect your ability to take care of yourself. If you are unable to take care of yourself physically, it can affect your mental health. This also affects the way you interact with others, including your romantic partner, friends and family. c. If you think you are not coping, it is important to talk to someone you trust, and to take steps to get help. d. Lifestyle balance is important to our well-being for many reasons. Understanding connections between our emotional and physical selves is particularly important. The next activity will focus on the importance of choosing a healthy balanced lifestyle. . It is important to understand this so that you are prepared to make decisions that are good for your well-being. Activity B: Understanding desire – know before you get there Introduction: This activity encourages you to think about the behavioural risks that may have a negative effect on your ability to choose a healthy and balance lifestyle. Remember that the choices you make will determine the kind of relationship you have in future. This is true for the romantic relationships that you will engage in with others. 1. We can remain in control of the relationships we engage in, especially romantic relationships, by making decisions about the risky behaviours we may face. Risky behaviours will influence each dimension of a healthy, balanced lifestyle. Being aware of possible responses can help us to think of ways to avoid emotional and physical risk, take more control, plan, and put protective strategies in place for our sexual and reproductive health. 2. Recall the different dimensions of a healthy and balanced lifestyle you dealt with in Activity A. 3. Create small groups with a few of the other learners. Your educator will provide you with some “if-then“ statements. In your group discuss the following: a. How do you think each situation could affect your goal for a healthy, balanced lifestyle? b. What choices you can make to ensure you maintain your sexual and reproductive health? 4. Look at the following “if-then” statements: a. If someone I know starts touching me in an intimate way, but I don’t want to have sex with them, then I should... b. If my partner is pressuring me to have a baby but I know that having a baby so young will not help me live a healthy, balanced lifestyle, as I have planned, then I should... c. If my partner and I are kissing and touching each other and I am not sure that we have a condom, then I should… d. If I get into a relationship with an older person, then I should… Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 43 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 e. If my current romantic relationship is in danger of becoming a sexual relationship, then I should… 2. Here are some important points for you to reflect on at the end of this lesson: a) Do you feel you are living a healthy balanced lifestyle? b) All the dimensions of your life are important. At this stage in your life, which dimension is the most important? c) Think about the goals you have set for yourself. How will changing or delaying some of your behaviours assist you to reach your set goals? Remember: If you have had a sexual relationship before, you can choose to abstain from having a sexual relationship now. You can change your mind and your behaviour as you go through life. HOMEWORK 1. Go over the content in this activity. Continue planning and thinking about how to achieve a balanced lifestyle as discussed in this lesson. Go back and make sure that you have captured all your responses to the questions in the two activities. 2. Spend some time reflecting on what kind of relationship you want for yourself and what risks to avoid. Think about the decisions you need to make that will help you to maintain a healthy and balanced lifestyle. CONSOLIDATION 1. As you mature, it is important to develop a healthy, balanced lifestyle and it is important for you to con- sider the steps they need to take to create and maintain a healthy, balanced lifestyle. 2. Make sure you think about what you want for yourself and what decisions you need to make to achieve your dreams and goals by having control over your sexual and reproductive health. 3. It’s important to remember the core messages of this lesson: Core messages • I have the right to say “no” to sexual attention and sex at any time. I also have the responsibility to respect “no” for an answer from somebody else. • I will choose if, and when, to have sex, and when not to. • To protect myself and others, I need to be honest and communicate well in sexual relationships. • If we choose to have sex, my partner and I will use a condom correctly, every time. • I respect my own and others’ well-being. 44 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 ASSESSMENT 1. Do Worksheet 11.4.3: I choose to have a healthy, balanced lifestyle as an assessment task. Fill in your responses on your own. Then discuss your answers with a peer. 2. Reflect on your answers if you think that the discussion with your peers has influenced you to think differently about your answers. RESOURCES/MATERIALS TABLE 11.4.1 Examples of activities for a balanced lifestyle Instructions: Look at the table below with the columns for the physical, intellectual, emotional, spiritual and social dimensions of your life. Answer the question below and in the table. What are the components of a healthy and balanced lifestyle? Physical Intellectual Emotional Social Spiritual E.g. Exercising to Reading Taking care of Spending time Go to a spiritual keep fit others with friends group or place of worship NOW ADD YOUR OWN IDEAS Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 45 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 WORKSHEET 11.4.1: My vision for a balanced lifestyle Introduction: For each of the five areas, write down the types of activities you envision yourself participating in that would help you to lead a healthy and a well-balanced lifestyle in the table below. Emotional Spiritual Intellectual Physical Social 46 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Worksheet 11.4.2: My lifestyle chart Instructions to complete Worksheet 11.4.2 1. Using the information you gave about yourself in Worksheet 11.4.1: My vision for a balanced lifestyle, fill in the chart below to score how balanced you consider your life to be now. 2. Use the rating scale below to help you score your lifestyle. Rating Scale: 1 = Not at all 2 = Just a little 3 = Average 4 = I am improving 5 = I am on target /doing great 3. For each category decide how well you are currently performing: 1, being not at all, up to 5, meaning you are doing great. 4. You may be doing better in some aspects than you are in others, so the rating you give will differ across the dimensions 5. The rating helps to assess how balanced your lifestyle is and which dimensions can be improved so that they do not become risks to your healthy, balanced lifestyle. How balanced is my life? 1 2 3 4 5 Physical Intellectual Emotional Social Spiritual Sub-total Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 47 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Something to think about: • Each of the dimensions of your life are interconnected and influence each other. A decision about one dimension will influence the other dimensions. • There are important connections between our physical well-being and our mental health. If you are depressed, this may affect your ability to take care of yourself. And if you are not able to take care of yourself physically, it can affect your mental health. Based on your rating (especially in dimensions where you feel you did not score well), write down the steps you can take to make your lifestyle healthier and more balanced in the space provided. Steps I can take to make my lifestyle healthier and more balanced: 1. ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ 2. ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ 3. ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ 4. ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ 48 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 WORKSHEET 11.4.3: I choose to have a healthy, balanced lifestyle There are many factors that influence the different dimensions of our lives. When we consider how these factors influence the health and balance of our lifestyles, we can make healthy decisions about them. Complete the table on your own first, then discuss your thoughts with a peer. Influences on the dimensions How it may influence my What decisions I could make of a healthy, balanced lifestyle lifestyle to avoid risks to my lifestyle Following the decisions my friends make about engaging in sexual activities Agreeing to meet with someone I started chatting to about having a relationship on social media Physical attraction is enough for starting a relationship with someone If we both want to only have a physical relationship, then there is no need for honesty about our pasts Commitment in a relationship does not mean committing to risky sexual behaviours GLOSSARY Balanced lifestyle: a lifestyle in which there is a healthy balance between one’s social, emotional, physical, intellectual and spiritual needs Critical analysis: a careful examination of something, typically by looking at all the different elements of the issue and then reaching a decision. Informed risk-taking: Making a decision to do something risky based on information that has been gathered and analysed about the different options available, and the consequences of the risks one intends to take. Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 49 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Lesson 11.5 Understanding the consequences of risky behaviour 50 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Lesson 11.5 Understanding the consequences of risky behaviour BRIEF LESSON SUMMARY In this lesson you will examine the definition of risk and the types of behaviour and situations that put one at risk. After analysing a dialogue about a risky situation and its consequences, you will develop your own dialogues/role- plays on risky behaviour. The lesson will provide you with the opportunity to reflect on your own behaviour that could be risky and allow you to identify ways to reduce this risk. KEY POINTS 1. Identify sexual and reproductive health (SRH) risks in your lives so that you can avoid or minimise risk that could impact on you achieving your goals. 2. Once you have identified the behaviour that increases risk, it is necessary to identify steps or actions you can take to minimise that risk. 3. It is important to reflect on your own risky behaviour and avoid putting someone else at risk. 4. Condoms protect you from unintended pregnancy, HIV and STIs. 5. To protect yourself and others and to avoid risk in your romantic / sexual relationships, you need to have respect, equality, honesty and mutual caring. 6. We can draw on our own resources and strategies to avoid risk, but we also need services and other support to help us realise our SRH rights. 7. It is better to think ahead of time about your SRH so that you can avoid risk of receiving, or causing emotional harm, unintended pregnancy, HIV, STIs and gender-based harm, like rape. Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 51 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 ACTIVITIES Activity A: Understanding risk and risky behaviour Introduction: This activity helps you to think about risky behaviour related to sexual activity. By identifying examples, you will be able to define the risk. Afterwards, you will be asked to think about situations in which you put yourself at risk, situations where others’ behaviour puts them at risk, and what the consequences of risk can be. 1. Think of ways that people of your age behave around sexual activity that could be considered risky. This should include risks you may take and risks you cause for others. 2. Respond to the term “risky behaviour”. What does it mean to you? Think of a wide range of examples. You will come back to some of these examples later in the lesson. 3. Brainstorm with your class on what “risk” means. Refer to the definition in Worksheet 11.5.1: Risky behaviour. Complete the worksheet in pairs, writing key points to each question. 4. Report back to your class. Remember it is important to get help when you need it. We have a responsibility as peers and friends to look after ourselves and to be there to help each other in happy and in difficult times. 5. Read the core messages for this lesson. How do the core messages help you think about choices you can make to avoid risky behaviour? Activity B: Risky behaviour role plays Introduction: This activity involves analysing a dialogue between two friends in a risky situation and the consequences of the situation. Later you can develop your own dialogue or role play a situation where there is risky behaviour. This activity helps you to analyse the risk, the behaviour that led up to it, the consequences and what can be done about it. 1. You are going to develop role plays in small groups that will show a risky behaviour, potential consequences, and how to handle a situation afterwards. First your will listen to, or read, the dialogue below as an example. You can volunteer to read or act the parts in the dialogue. 52 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 2. Answer the following questions as a class: a. What was the risky behaviour? b. What could happen as a result of this type of behaviour? c. How were the negative consequences of the risky behaviour handled afterwards? d. What are some messages related to risky behaviour based on this dialogue? e. In general, what are the possible consequences of risky behaviour and what would be the best way to prevent or avoid it? 3. Divide into small groups to develop and practice a short role play or dialogue that shows a risky behaviour, potential consequences and how to handle situations resulting from the risk. You should think about the messages related to risk that you are trying to get across. 4. Complete and practice your dialogues. A few groups will have a turn to put on their plays. 5. At the end of each role play, have a discussion. Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 53 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Activity C: Assessing risky behaviour Introduction: In this activity you analyse the level of risk for different types of sexual behaviour. You also identify ways to avoid, reduce or prevent risk for your own well-being and the well-being of your romantic/ sexual partners. 1. Risk avoidance and reduction /prevention are better for our personal safety and well-being. To avoid risky behaviour and situations, you need to assess the risk levels of different types of behaviour. Turn to Worksheet 11.5.2: Assessing sexual risk. You are going to fill out the chart individually. 2. Your educator will take you through an example so that you are clear on the task. Once you decide on your answer put an X in the appropriate column (for example, high risk). Then discuss actions that could be taken to make this behaviour safer. 3. Review your responses as a class after you have finished filling in the table. It is important to understand which situations are risky and how to avoid, reduce or prevent the risk associated with them. HOMEWORK 1. Reflect on the different examples of risky behaviour that were discussed during class. 2. Think about your own behaviour. Are you taking unnecessary risks that could be reduced or avoided? 3. Make a list of 3 - 5 examples of behavior that you would like to change in order to minimise your risk. 4. Write down how you are going to do this: what actions will you take to reduce or prevent the risk? Risky behaviour Actions to take to minimise risk 1. 1. 2. 2. 3. 3. 4. 4. 5. 5. 54 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 CONSOLIDATION This lesson began with a definition of risk and the types of behaviour and situations that put one at risk. It then analysed different risky situations, including what led up to the risky behaviour, what the consequences were, and how to prevent or reduce risk in the future. Through the homework, you will reflect more deeply on your own risky behaviour and determine ways to lesson or avoid the risks. you should go over the core messages of the lesson. Core messages • I will choose if, and when, to have sex, or not to. • I have the right to say “no” to sexual attention and sex at any time. I also have the responsibility to respect “no” for an answer. • If we choose to have sex, my partner and I will use a condom correctly every time. • To protect myself and others, I need to be honest and communicate well in sexual relationships. ASSESSMENT 1. The role play in Activity B is the assessment task. The task requires that you prepare a dialogue on a selected topic to be presented to the other groups. 2. Complete the task in Activity C: Assessing risky behaviour to help consolidate the discussion on the value of thinking about behaviour that could be considered risky (either in a current relationship or when setting up a new relationship). Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 55 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 RESOURCES/MATERIALS Worksheet 11.5.1: Risky behaviour Risk: definition Risk is when someone (including yourself) or something is exposed to danger, harm, or loss. It also includes when you put someone else at risk to danger, harm, or loss. Examples of risky behaviour our age group might do out of choice Examples of someone putting us at risk because of what they, through their behaviour, might do to us Think about a time that someone you know did something that was risky behaviour. What happened and what was the consequence? Worksheet 11.5.2: Assessing sexual risk Introduction: 1. The activity asks that you think about which behaviour poses a risk and which is not risky. Each statement gives the behaviour to be discussed. Read each statement. 2. Fill in what you think the risk level for each statement is by writing an X under the appropriate column (not a risk, risk or high risk). Discuss in your pair (or group) why you have given each risk a particular rating. 3. Discuss actions that you can take to make the behaviour less risky and write notes in the last column, “Actions to make it ... safer”. 56 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 What’s the risk? Behaviour Not a Risk High Actions to make it risk risk safer Rate each of these for risk: 1. Kissing (exchange of saliva) 2. Touching your partner’s genitals without intercourse 3. Sexual intercourse: between heterosexual couple (people of the opposite sex) with penis penetration of vagina 4. Anal sex between two people where penis enters anus 5. Oral sex (mouth to genitals) 6. Masturbation 7. Having unprotected sex (sex without a condom) with someone whose HIV status you don’t know 8. Sex with someone where you both have been tested recently 9. Using a condom every time you have sex even if you do not know each other’s HIV status 10. Having sex when your partner has HIV and you are negative but taking PrEP 11. Having sex protected with a condom if you are HIV positive and your health provider says you are virally suppressed 12. Believing your partner when they say they are sure they do not have an STI 13. Getting drunk at a party 14. Walking alone in the veld at night 15. Being in a sexual relationship with someone who has economic power over you Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 57 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 GLOSSARY Reproductive health risks: actions one takes that could potentially result in a negative health outcome such as unwanted pregnancy or STIs, including HIV Risk: Something that is potentially dangerous or harmful. You can put yourself at risk if you act impulsively without thinking a situation. You can also put others are risk. For example, if you travel in a car with a drunk driver, you, the driver and the people on the road are at risk. Risk assessment Weighing up a situation and identifying factors that could be harmful or dangerous. Knowing that your romantic partner is planning on drinking alcohol when you go to visit him/her and identifying what could happen to you, or your partner, or both of you, is be an example of risk assessment. Risk avoidance: When, after identifying the risks of a particular situation and the possible consequences, you choose to avoid the situation or not go ahead with your plans, this is risk avoidance. -Choosing to use condoms when having sex is an example of avoiding the risk of acquiring or passing on an STI, including HIV or having an unintended pregnancy. Risky behaviour: Behaviour that can be harmful for you and for others. For example, if a couple has sex without using a condom, they put themselves at risk of getting pregnant or and STI, including HIV. Risk reduction/prevention: Taking actions or making decisions that reduce your chances of a negative outcome. For example, if you make sure not to walk home alone from a party late at night will reduce your chances of getting robbed or raped. 58 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Lesson 11.6 Positive role models Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 59 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Lesson 11.6 Positive role models BRIEF LESSON SUMMARY This lesson deals with the importance of having positive role models in our lives and how they influence us. You will explore the qualities of a good role model, and the importance of having positive role models in life. You will learn from some activists, many of whom are involved with HIV and AIDS activism, or have influenced our perception about gender roles. The activists have all overcome their own barriers. You will also explore your own potential to become role models and identify your own barriers and ways to overcome them. This includes identifying the kind of support, advice and assistance you need, and where you might get it. This lesson wraps up by discussing the important role mentors can play in our lives. KEY POINTS 1. You can find a motivational role model and you can be a role model. 2. Role models are people whose lives, ideas, or actions have influenced others in a positive way. 3. We must choose our role models carefully, taking into account their values and beliefs and the type of lives that they lead. 4. Role models are all around us, in our families, schools, peer groups and communities and in ourselves. 5. As you move into adult life, it is important to identify someone who can mentor you. ACTIVITIES Activity A: Role models are… Introduction: This activity explores the qualities of a good role model and why they are important in our lives. At the end of this activity you will choose someone who is a role model in your own life. 1. Reflect for a minute about positive role models. a. How would you define a positive role model? b. How would you describe their qualities and their actions? c. How would you define a positive role model in relation to sexual and reproductive health? 2. Positive role models are important in your lives because a good role model will help you on your path of self-development. You may choose someone who shares your personal values, belief system, faith, and other parts of your life to do with culture and traditions that affirm you. Your chosen role models may have a considerable impact on your career opportunities and choices. 3. Refer to Worksheet 11.6.1: To be a role model. Work in pairs or small groups and fill in as many attributes that you believe constitute a positive role model. Complete the worksheet. 60 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 4. Share your discussion with your class and add any additional positive qualities to this list. 5. Think about people you identify as role models. Choose one person you know locally – it could be a peer, a family member or a community member who is a role model for you. Then choose a role model who may be a well-known person you admire, not somebody you know personally. 6. Write down the names of these people below and answer the question: My local role model is ……………………………………………… because ………………………………………… My well-known role model is ………………………………………… because ………………………………….. Activity B: Role models who’ve made a difference to our country Introduction: In this activity, you will reflect on several examples of present day South African role models. Role models presented in this lesson are involved with HIV and AIDS activism or have influenced our perception about gender roles. They have overcome barriers. This lesson will also discuss how you can be positive role models. Positive role models are often everyday people making good choices for your own and other people’s well-being. 1. Read through the personal stories of positive role models in Reading 11.6.1: Heroes today, role models tomorrow! 2. Complete Worksheet 11.6.2: Role models and their contribution. Share your answers with the class. 3. It is important to understand that in addition to other qualities, positive role models can be social activists working for positive change, and/or health activists fighting for sexual and reproductive health rights. Many of the South African role models discussed are also activists. Read about the social activist and health activist below. A social activist is someone who works for social change. They are role models for ensuring that all people are treated fairly and are included socially. We have many social activists who have fought, and continue to fight, for social change. Our most memorable social activist was President Nelson Mandela. A health activist fights for sexual and reproductive health rights for all people, regardless of their HIV status or sexual orientation, and fights for our rights to good health services. Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 61 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 4. Role models are often ordinary people doing extraordinary things. Look around you. We are all role models. Determine whether your behaviour sends out positive or negative messages to the younger learners in the school and in your communities. You will engage with this topic in Worksheet 11.6.3: What would I want to be known for? Consider how you want to be remembered. Consider the issues your generation faces that you might want to stand up and fight for, including those related to sexual and reproductive health. In the footprint, complete the following statements: • I want others to remember me as a person who… • I would like to be remembered for being an activist who… Activity C: Mentors are… Introduction: In this activity, you will distinguish the difference between a role model and a mentor. You will wrap up the lesson by exploring how to approach someone and ask them to be a mentor to you. 1. Listen to your educator talk about their experience with a mentor. 2. What do you think is the difference between a mentor and a role model? 3. As you move into adulthood, you are likely to develop a relationship with someone who has pursued a similar path in life; someone who may have the type of experience that is meaningful for you or has specialised knowledge which enables you to succeed in your chosen work or path in life. Entering into a mentoring relationship can take time. If you meet someone who you think might be a good mentor, you should consider asking for a meeting with that person. Some conversation starters are: • “I’m really interested in how you got where you are. Would you have some time to share some of your experience?” • “I’m thinking of pursuing studies in _________, and was hoping to get your advice.” • “I’ve just started this new job, and I am not sure how to handle_____. Would you have some time to chat with me? I could use some advice.” CONSOLIDATION 1. Conclude the lesson by thinking about the fact that role models are people whose lives, ideas or actions have influenced others in a positive way. 2. You can find role models who motivate or inspire you, and you can also be role models for others. 3. As you move into adult life and make decisions about the future, it is important to identify someone who can be a mentor to you. 4. After reviewing the key points for this lesson, reflect on the core messages. Core messages • I know my HIV and STI and general sexual and reproductive health status • I want to be part of a community that stops gender harm and violence and creates safety and peace in its place 62 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 HOMEWORK You will work on a project in this task. You should be able to prepare for this task beforehand. Take time to prepare your projects before you do the activity. Carry out the following activity as homework. 1. You should find a new role model in your community, somebody whose story inspires you because they have overcome a barrier related to SRH. They may, for example, have disclosed their HIV or TB status, gone for an HIV test, taken a stance against women and children abuse, pushed for the right for pregnant learners to continue their studies, or spoken out about rape. 2. You should do some background research on the role model of your choice and arrange to interview the role model. Answers to the questions you ask should be written down in your notebooks. From your research or interviews, you should answer the following questions: a. What are the role model’s views on the impact of substance abuse, abuse of power and control, gender-based violence, or responsible sexual behaviour? b. What are barriers the role model had to overcome to become the person he/she is today? c. What type of person does the role model hope to influence by their example? 3. After you have completed your research and/or interview with your role model, you should reflect on the following questions and note the answers in your personal notebooks: a. Which decisions and choices do I need to make to help me overcome barriers? b. What type of support, advice and assistance will I need in overcoming barriers? c. Who do I need to speak to, so I can get the support, advice and assistance I need? ASSESSMENT 1. Use Worksheet 11.6.1: Role models and their contribution as an assessment task. 2. The task requires you to read the information provided in Reading 11.6.1: Heroes today, role models tomorrow! The task assesses reading comprehension and encourages you to reflect on values and attitudes that are important to them. 3. You can use peer assessment to assess your responses and provide feedback to your peers. 4. The references provided below will help you do your own research if you have access to the internet. Otherwise all information is included in the reading. Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 63 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 RESOURCES/MATERIALS Worksheet 11.6.1: To be a role model Introduction: Work in pairs or small groups (depending on how your educator assigns you) to fill in as many attributes you believe constitute a positive role model. 64 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Reading 11.6.1: Heroes today, role models tomorrow! Introduction: Read the following text on five South Africans who have the characteristics of role models. Then complete the table in Worksheet 11.6.2. What they do/ have done Thabang Sefatsa is one of the more recent SA celebrities to disclose his HIV status. The former footballer also revealed that the reason why players do not disclose their status is because they are afraid of stigma.10 Former president Nelson Mandela hailed Judge Edwin Cameron as “one of South Africa’s new heroes”. This Constitutional Court of South Africa judge has been living with HIV since the 1980s. He is on ARV treatment, which has helped keep him healthy for many years. The celebrated judge who has won many awards has been described as “the greatest legal mind of his generation” and “in a league of his own.” He publically talks about being gay, and wrote a book called ‘Witness to AIDS’ about his own life, and the challenges of discovering and dealing with his HIV status.11 This gospel singer, Musa ‘Queen’ Njoko, has been living with HIV/AIDS for 21 years. She was only 22 when she was diagnosed and at the time, there was no treatment available in South Africa. Njoko has since become one of the most prominent voices fighting HIV/AIDS.12 Zackie Achmat is the co-founder of the Treatment Action Campaign (TAC) and was a pivotal figure in the fight for access to treatment for HIV and AIDS in South Africa during Thabo Mbeki’s presidency. Before starting TAC, he was the director of the AIDS Law Project at the University of the Witwatersrand. In addition, he co-founded the National Coalition for Gay and Lesbian Equality which worked to ensure protection for gays and lesbians in the Constitution, and the Social Justice Coalition, which fights to promote rights defined by our Constitution, particularly among poor and unemployed people. The activist and filmmaker has been living with HIV since 1990 and famously refused treatment until it was accessible to everyone in South Africa. We will return to the work of his campaign in grade 12.13 Caster Semenya is a South African middle-distance runner and 2017 Olympic gold medallist. She won the women’s 800 metres at the 2009 World Championships with a time of 1:55.45 and at the 2017 World Championships in her new personal best, 1:55.16. She also won silver medals at the 2011 World Championships and the 2012 Summer Olympics, both in the 800 metres. She was the winner of the gold medal in the 800 metre event at the2016 Summer Olympics. She challenged gender bias because she was born as an intersex person and has had to challenge her right to run as a woman athlete.14 1011121314 10 Adapted from: https://www.news24.com/Drum/Archive/soccer-star-reveals-his-hiv-status-20170728 11 Adapted from: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edwin_Cameron 12 Adapted from: https://highwaymail.co.za/243218/living-positively-7-famous-people-living-with-hivaids/ 13 Adapted from: https://www.brandsouthafrica.com/people-culture/people/achmataccolade and https://highwaymail. co.za/243218/living-positively-7-famous-people-living-with-hivaids/ 14 Adapted from: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caster_Semenya Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 65 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Worksheet 11.6.2: Role models and their contribution Introduction: Complete the worksheet by answering the questions for each role model. Refer to Reading 11.6.1 for information about each role model. Public figure Their contribution to Did they have to What stands On a scale of society cope with and out about 0-10 how much overcome any their personal do you admire barriers? If yes, values? this person? which Caster Semenya Zackie Achmat Edwin Cameron Thabang Sefatsa Musa “Queen” Mojoko 66 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Worksheet 11.6.3: What would I want to be known for? Introduction: In the footprint, complete the following statements: I want others to remember me as a person who… I would like to be remembered for being an activist who… Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 67 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 GLOSSARY Mentors: People who can be (and usually are) role models. They play a more specific role in our lives, as someone we can reach out to for advice, coaching, or even advocacy when we need it. Mentors are experienced and trusted advisors to whom we can turn when we need someone who understands what we are trying to achieve. Role models: People we look up to because we admire their behaviour, attitudes or success; we want to emulate them. We may not know our role models personally but admire them and want to be like them in some way. We may have more than one role model. Social activist: An individual who is motivated to bring about change in society. Someone who feels strongly about a certain cause and works towards change can be called a “social activist”. 68 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Lesson 11.7 Gender, power and violence Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 69 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Lesson 11.7 Gender, power and violence BRIEF LESSON SUMMARY This lesson will focus on the abuse of power that can result from unequal gender power relations and unequal power relations more generally. You will first review an important thread of concepts related to gender, power, and violence that you have covered in grades 10 and 11, in order to build on the ideas presented in those lessons. You will then consider the forms of gender-based violence (GBV) and harm that you are aware of. Based on this reflection, you will work in groups to respond to common scenarios, while simulating a community radio talk show. The exercise will highlight a range of abuses of power, with particular attention to sexual harassment and other forms of abuse, gender-based harm and violence. KEY POINTS 1. The gender norms around us influence our ideas of how society expects us to act as young men and women. Gender stereotypes can be harmful when they influence our actions. 2. It is important that we form our own identities and think for ourselves about our relationships and what we want from them. 3. When one person in a relationship has more power and takes advantage of that power in a sexual relationship, the relationship is unsafe for the other person. 4. There are many different kinds of abuses of power caused by unequal gender power relations. 5. Not all sexual violence happens to women and girls. Men and boys and those with other sexual and gender identities (LGBTQIA) can be targeted as well. 6. GBV has negative effects on the health and well-being of victims, whether it is verbal, emotional, financial or physical violence. 7. People who abuse their power must take responsibility and stop what they are doing. 8. We must all work to make gender relations more equitable and safe. ACTIVITIES Activity A: Power, sex and abuse Introduction: Sexual violence is a complex topic, and some forms of sexual abuse are harder to detect than others. To understand and protect ourselves it is necessary to review some basic ideas that we have been learning about gender, power and relationships. 1. Remember that you explored the concepts of power, power relations, masculinity, femininity and gender in Grade 10. Can you recall some of the most important points that you remember? 2. Review the points below to be sure that you understand the progression of ideas from gender to power to power imbalance in relationship to violence. Use the definitions in the glossary if needed, to be sure 70 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 that you understand the concepts. Remember that these points were covered in your Grade 10 lessons: • How we learn about gender norms i.e., how society expects us to act as young men and women. • Gender stereotypes and how these can influence our actions. Refer to the glossary if the you need to recall the meaning. • Forming our own identities and thinking for ourselves about gender stereotypes. • How attitudes and behaviour that follow gender stereotypes can be harmful in romantic or intimate relationships. • Consenting relationships (consensual sex). Both parties must fully consent to a sexual relationship. If one of the parties does not want a sexual relationship and sex is forced on them, this is rape. If one person changes their mind: this means there is no consent. Sex without consent is rape. • Relationships in which there is a power imbalance can be harmful to the person in the relationship who has less power. • Unintended pregnancy, HIV and violence can all result from relationships in which somebody is forced or put under pressure to have a sexual relationship they don’t want. • Age differences between partners can create a power imbalance. (This was discussed in Lesson 11.2). 3. Rape is one form of gender-based violence that has alarming statistics in South Africa. We have many programmes in place to discuss issues related to rape and what support needs to be in place to support rape victims. In Grade 10 you learned about rape. In this lesson you are going to explore other forms of gender-based violence and harm that may be less obvious. Think of ways that unfair power dynamics play out in sexual relationships. Can you think of situations where it might seem that it is just playful but isn’t? In the image below, boys are whistling and harassing a girl on the playground. It looks as though it might be playful and harmless, but the girl is feeling furious and humiliated and it is not funny – it is abusive. What about situations that can become abusive? Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 71 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 4. Turn to Reading 11.7.1: Abuse of power and gender-based harm. Your educator will ask for a volunteer to read the text aloud, while the rest of the class follows the reading in their books. Is there anything in the reading that was surprising or new thinking for you? 5. Your educator will read the situations below to you. You will then answer the following questions in relation to the situations. • What form of gender-based harm is this an example of? • Why is this abuse of power? Situation Problem You go for a job interview and the person who is hiring hints that this job could be yours if you provide a special favour to the boss. During your shift at work, your manager often leans over a little too close and makes you feel uncomfortable. A man in your community has frequently asked you to have sex with him, and he does not seem to be taking “No!” for an answer. You start to wonder whether it would be easier to just do what he asks. Your mother’s boyfriend has been bothering you whenever she is out of the house. You try to avoid him but notice that he is starting to pay attention to your little sister. You conclude that you should give him what he wants, to protect your little sister. A man and woman have been living together for years. Lately she has not felt like having sex. He feels entitled to it and forces her to have sex. A friend shares that her uncle has been coming into her bed at night and making her do things she does not want to do. Note that the reading and discussions provide background for the group work and presentations you are going to do for the rest of the lesson. 72 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Activity B: Listen in, listen up! Introduction: This activity will provide us with an opportunity to consider different scenarios people face and to work together to develop advice on what steps to take to address it. 1. You will be required to imagine that you are running a community radio station talk show. You will tackle situations from callers that illustrate an abuse of power and potential gender-based violence. 2. You will be divided into groups (no more than six per group, to allow enough time for the full activity). You will be assigned a caller scenario from those provided in the your learner books. Your group will choose a caller, a host and an expert. The whole group will work together to prepare the role play and key points to cover during the call. 3. You will have ten minutes to prepare. 4. You will have up to three minutes to role-play your call and give advice, and another 1 minute for feedback from your audience (including your educator). After each role play, feedback should be provided quickly to ensure that you all have enough time for your role plays. 5. For each role play, make sure you have correctly identified and agreed on the following: a. The type of abuse of power being presented b. That abuse of power is wrong c. That your group gave appropriate referrals to support services that each caller should access. For example, hotlines, clinics, NGOs in the community that offer support and services. Radio talk show: Listen in, listen up. Instructions for learner groups 1. You will be assigned a scenario from the list below. Each group will select someone to be the “caller’, someone to be the “talk show host’, and someone to be an “expert” who can provide advice on the situation. It will be the responsibility of the whole group to consider the situation of the caller and develop some advice that their expert will then deliver. You can add details if it helps to make your role play more effective. 2. Each group will role play their situation for the class. The class will have an opportunity to add ideas and provide constructive feedback. 3. You will have ten minutes to plan your show and three minutes to do your talk show presentation to the class. Your classmates are your audience. Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 73 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 4. Your classmates and your teacher will use these criteria to give you constructive feedback after your talk show scene: • Did the host clearly communicate the type of abuse and why it is wrong? • Was useful advice provided to the caller? • Was it clear that the caller has a right to protection and to report the abuse to stop the harm to them and others? • Was there a positive message about gender equality? Scenarios for radio talk show activity15 Scenario 1 A teenage boy calls in to say, “I’m in a crew of guy friends. Every day we like to wait a block from the school and whistle at the girls who walk past. Sometimes, to keep it interesting, we rate the girls out of ten on looks or friendliness. But now the girls have complained about us to the principal. I can’t understand why they can’t just loosen up and take a joke? Now they’ve got us into trouble.” Scenario 2 A listener calls in to say, “My teacher comes up too close to me when we discuss school work. He sometimes asks me to stay behind after school so I can improve my grades. But then he will drop in questions like: Do I have a girlfriend? Do I like kissing? And stuff like that. I need to get good grades but... What can I do?” Scenario 3 A listener calls in to say, “I’m a manager in a small company. I hired a young woman, who I also consider to be particularly attractive, as my personal assistant. She keeps things very professional. I expected more ‘benefits’. I sometimes put my hand on her knee during one-on-one meetings with her but she moves her knee away. I suggested to her that her stay at the company would be much more fruitful if she were ‘friendlier’. What’s wrong with her? Where’s her sense of ambition? Doesn’t she want to advance in the company?” 15 Several scenes adapted from Soul City Institute for Social Justice (2016). Kwanele! A training manual for community radio stations – developing content on gender-based violence 74 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Scenario 4 A listener calls in to say, “I’m 23 years old and I identify as being a woman. I have a man’s body physically. I’m what is called transgender. Since as long as I can remember, I have wanted to wear girls’ and women’s clothes and to hang out and play with girls. I can’t afford to have a sex change but it is my dream. I’m sexually attracted to men. At work, I have to dress like a man and use the men’s toilet. Sometimes guys follow me in and mock me about being in the wrong toilet, or they ask, ‘Do you stand or sit when you go?’ My work future looks bleak because management won’t give me a position where I meet clients directly. To cope with the stress, I turn to drugs. On some days I wake up just wanting to be dead.” Scenario 5 A boy calls in. He says it’s really hard for him to talk about it, but he needs to get advice; he’s really scared. He says,”Since as long as I can remember, my uncle who lives with us has come into my bed every so often at night. He started off by touching me all over and telling me to touch him. More recently, he forces me to hold his penis and puts his hand over mine until he has ejaculated. He says he will kill me if I ever tell anyone. But it is getting worse. Last night he tried to force his penis into my bum. I managed to escape out of the window and I spent the night behind the outside toilet. What can I do? Where should I go? My mother must be very worried about me because I’m not at home and it is night-time now.” Scenario 6 A caller phones in. She says everything was fine when she and her husband were dating and then got engaged. They treated each other as equals and supported each other in their goals. But since they got married everything has changed. The caller says, “My husband expects me to get home before him even though I work further away from home than he does. If the food is not ready he calls me a ‘useless wife’ and other things I can’t even say over the radio. He even threw a plate at me the other night when he said the food was not properly cooked. He also expects me to have sex whenever he wants it, whether I want to or not. I usually give in because it is easier than arguing. Do other listeners have similar abuse happening to them? I can’t believe the person I married has turned into this monster.” Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 75 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Scenario 7 A woman listener calls in to say, “I work in a local shebeen. I usually tend the bar, but sometimes I wait on tables. Almost every day, some guy will try to charm me, ask me to come home with him, or be just plain annoying. Sometimes if someone is drunk, it can turn nasty. Of course the tavern owner wants me to be nice, in order to sell more beer. Please can other women tell us if they have the same problem and how they handle it? Can’t tavern owners do something about it?” CONSOLIDATION 1. A range of difficult and uncomfortable topics have been covered. Many of us will know someone affected by these issues, or we ourselves may be affected. 2. You will talk more about seeking help in the next lesson, which addresses rape and sexual violence. 3. If you feel you need to discuss it sooner, you can reach out to your educator, another trusted adult, or call the hotline number in your books. 4. Review the key points listed at the beginning of this lesson. 5. Turn to the core messages in your learner books and reflect on the messages. 6. Share which of the messages “speak” to the content we have covered in this lesson today. HOMEWORK You will consolidate the issues that emerged from the different role plays by writing up your own summary notes on each of the different scenarios in Activity B. ASSESSMENT 1. Use the role play in Activity B as the assessment task. 2. You will prepare a role play for a radio talk show. You will work in groups and present your role plays to the class. You will also provide feedback on the role plays presented by the other groups. 3. The following criteria have been given to them to guide your preparation and their presentations: • Did the host clearly communicate the type of abuse and why it is wrong? • Was useful advice provided to the caller? • Was it clear that the caller has a right to protection and to report the abuse to stop harm to themselves and to others? • Was there a positive message about gender equality? 76 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Reading 11.7.1: Abuse of power and gender-based harm Gender-based violence (GBV) and gender-based harm are broad terms that have been defined to describe acts of violence that target individuals or groups on the basis of their sex or sexual identity. This includes physical, mental or sexual harm and suffering, and can include situations where someone is pressured or forced into actions or roles that affect their freedom. Unfortunately, there are many forms of gender-based harm, and it is helpful to be aware of them in order to recognise them prevent them, and help someone who may be a victim: • Domestic violence is violence which occurs in the home. This can include verbal, emotional, psychological, or sexual abuse (and can be considered rape). It can also include murder, which is sometimes referred to as femicide (if the person killed is a woman). Another name for domestic violence between sexual partners is intimate partner violence (IPV). • Domestic violence can include sexual abuse of those who are younger or more vulnerable by an adult or older person in the home. The abuser can be someone related or unrelated. When the person is a member of the family it is considered incest. Incest is generally understood as sexual activity between a younger person or a child and their parent (including adoptive, foster or step parent, grandparent, child, grandchild, sibling or half-sibling, uncle, aunt, nephew or niece).16 Incest is against the law and it has emotional consequences for the whole family. • Not all GBV or acts of sexual violence are committed against women and girls. Sexual violence can be committed against boys or men; and sometimes those with sexual or gender identities that are different from the person carrying out the violent act, for example, LGBTQIA people. • Gender-based harm is an abuse of power. Gender-based harm is sometimes ignored because of unequal power and rights. In our patriarchal society, men and boys have been taught – and often believe – that they have the right to power over girls and women, or that their needs and satisfaction are more important than the needs and rights of girls and women. • Sexual coercion refers to situations where a person may feel forced into a sexual relationship because they are dependent on someone for money, support or even protection. When the person who is under pressure gives in, it may seem as though they gave consent, but because the person with the resources is misusing their power, it is still a form of abuse. • People in abusive relationships are at higher risk of unintended pregnancy, HIV, STIs and mental/emotional health problems because it is harder for them to protect themselves. • There are other forms of gender-based harm that often go unnoticed. Sometimes it may even seem as though the person who is being violated has voluntarily consented. • Sexual harassment is a common form of this. It refers to unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favours, and other behaviour of a sexual nature. In the work place, it is considered sexual harassment if sexual activity is expected in order to get or keep a job. It is also sexual harassment if anyone’s sexual talk, touch or actions create a working environment that feels uncomfortable or unsafe. Most people know someone who has experienced this in some way, but they have not known that it is something they do not have to accept. • We do not have to accept sexual and gender-based harm in our lives: • We have a right to say “No” and the responsibility to respect “No” to sexual attention and sex at any time and in any situation. • We can do things in our everyday lives to promote gender equality and peace and eliminate gender-based harm and violence. 16 Retrieved: https://patient.info/doctor/incest Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 77 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 GLOSSARY Abuse of power: When someone misuses their influence or control in a relationship, this is an abuse of power. This can occur when one person is dependent on another for something that is important to them. Domestic violence: Behaviour that causes physical harm and fear; and prevents a partner from living their own life freely or forces them to behave in ways they do not choose. Domestic violence includes the use of physical and sexual violence, bullying and threats, emotional abuse and economic deprivation. Different forms of domestic violence/abuse can occur at any one time within the same relationship or household. Gender-based harm or gender-based violence (GBV): One person hurts another as a result of their relationship as men and women. This includes harm between sexual or intimate partners; it is also used to describe harm in relation to gender or sexual identity. Gender-based harm or violence can be physical, sexual, and or emotional. It is usually related to unequal power that may exist between genders. Gender norms: Ideas, attitudes and ways of behaving that we learn from birth from our families, schools, society, including the media, based on whether we are boys or girls, or men or women. Transgender children, teenagers and adults are often stigmatised, as are people who identify as LGBTQIA, because they don’t fit into traditional gender norms. Gender roles: Expectations that society teaches us about what is considered appropriate behaviour for girls and boys, and men and women. Girls and boys are taught to behave in a certain way from childhood. These teachings are communicated in our families, our societies and our culture – and they influence the way we behave, our appearance, and how we view our abilities and our prospects as women and men. Gender socialisation The process of learning what is expected of us as boys and girls, men and women. This is a process that begins at birth, and we learn from what we observe and what we are taught. This is influenced by our peers, the adults in our lives, the media and our traditions. This may include stereotypes which we can choose to reject, and norms that we do not have to follow when we do not agree with them. Our Constitution gives all people in South Africa the right to choose their sexual identity for themselves, for example. Incest: Sexual contact between a person and their parent (including adoptive, foster or step parent), grandparent, child, grandchild, sibling or half-sibling, uncle, aunt, nephew or niece. It is against the law and has emotional consequences for the whole family. This is also sometimes called “familial sexual abuse”. Intimate partner violence (IPV): Any form of violence that happens within an intimate, sexual or romantic relationship. Power inequality/unequal power relations: When one person or group has more influence or control than another person or group in a relationship. This can occur as a result of differences in age, wealth, roles in work, school or social contexts. Sometimes this is informal and not obvious, until a problem occurs. Sexual abuse: Sexual behaviour that is forced upon someone against their will. 78 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Sexual coercion: A similar term, for unwanted sexual behaviour that is forced upon someone by circumstance of need or harassment, rather than by physical force. To coerce means to put pressure on somebody to do something that they do not want to do. Sexual harassment: Unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favours, and other behaviour of a sexual nature. It can happen in work place, on the street, at home, by someone you know or don’t know. Stereotypes: Generalised statements or ideas about a group of people, that can often be hurtful and cause harm. Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 79 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Lesson 11.8 Rape – Prevention, support and change 80 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Lesson 11.8 Rape – Prevention, support and change BRIEF LESSON SUMMARY The lesson will focus on what rape is, how to prevent rape, and what to do if you or someone close to you is raped. It will look at some of the causes of gender-based harm in our country and mechanisms to try and prevent it. The key message that you will need to take away is that, under all and any circumstances, rape is wrong. Do not rape. KEY POINTS 1. Rape is an act of violence and an abuse of power. It is always wrong. 2. There is nothing the victim/survivor has done to deserve being raped and they should never be blamed. 3. There are some acts that may not be understood as rape, but they are still rape and must be stopped. Any sexual act without consent is considered rape. 4. We can stand by rape survivors to help them get the support that they need. 5. We should know where to get help when someone is raped. Survivors of rape will need medical, emotional and social support and often legal support as well. 6. We have the power to make a difference by challenging the culture of violence and victim blaming attitudes 7. Do not rape and do not let your friends see rape as normal or right. ACTIVITIES Introduction: Rape is a difficult and emotional topic. We read about increasing instances of rape in our media daily and many of us know someone who has been raped. Some of us may have experienced sexual violence or abuse ourselves. Some of us might realise that we have forced someone to have sex against their will. Rape survivors need our care and support no matter when the rape happened, who the rapist was or how and where the rapist carried out the rape. The reason for this lesson is so that we can work towards some strategies and actions to stop rape. You will be able refer to resources in your learner book for places to get help and support for surviving rape. Activity A: Rape an act of violence, and abuse of power Introduction: In this activity you will focus on understanding “rape culture” and the beliefs that allow sexual violence to continue. 1. Read through the key points for this lesson. Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 81 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 2. Refer to the information in Reading 11.8.1: Rape. This will help you to better understand sexual violence. Read it aloud in class or work with your educator and class to summarise the key points if you read this ahead of time. 3. Suggest possible reasons why we have such high rates of rape and violence in our country. What factors may contribute to the “culture of violence”? Rape is an act of violence and abuse of power. Rape is not about sex. Do a quick brainstorm on what you think can be done to stop rape. 4. Refer to Worksheet 11.8.1: Beliefs about rape. Work in small groups and review the worksheet with your class. These examples show us that there are many wrong beliefs or myths about rape. a. Can you give some examples to the class? b. Why do you think myths or wrong beliefs about rape have the potential to be harmful? 5. These wrong beliefs or myths about rape contribute to victim-blaming and are why the “the culture of violence” continues. Activity B: What a rape survivor needs Introduction: In this activity you will look more closely at some of the physical, emotional and social consequences of rape, and the impact on people who commit rape. You are going to learn what types of support a person who has been raped needs and ways to be supportive of someone who has been raped or abused. 1. Brainstorm on the impact of rape has on the life of someone who has been raped. Include all aspects of their well-being: physical, emotional, mental, social and spiritual (with families, friends, peers and in the community). Give concrete examples. 2. All of these are reasons why we must do everything we can to be supportive of someone who has been harmed by sexual violence and abuse. 3. Turn to and read Reading 11.8.2: What to do if you or someone you know is raped with the class. 4. In pairs or small groups, discuss what you can do to be supportive of someone who has been raped. After discussing this for a few minutes, think of a situation where someone was raped or abused (it does not have to be a person you know). Think of what that person might be experiencing and write a letter of support telling them the things you would want to say to them. You should write you own letter. 4. Remind the learners where they can find information on where to get help. If you have any posters on the wall with local community service providers and contact numbers on them, refer to them. Also reinforce the fact that a rape survivor can get help even if the rape took place a long time ago. 5. Wrap up this activity by reminding the learners about the core messages for Grade 11 that are particularly relevant for this session: • I will choose if, and when, to have sex and when not to. • I have the right to say “No!” to sexual attention and sex at any time. I also have the respon-sibility to respect “No!” for an answer. • I respect my own and others’ well-being. • I want to be part of a community that stops gender harm and violence and creates safety and peace in its place. 82 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 HOMEWORK 1. Each one of us can play a part in stopping blaming the victim for rape. We have focused on wrong beliefs and attitudes that enable “rape culture” to continue. Pay close attention to things you see and hear in the media and social media that are examples of victim-blaming or reinforcement of male dominance in relation to sex. This could include jokes, conversations or images. Write examples down, with your own response to how you can take a stand against jokes about rape and victim-blaming. 2. Consider the newspaper headlines below. Until recently the burden has fallen mostly on women to protect themselves from being raped. Men too are raped. But it is also important that men play a role in preventing rape, and more men are starting to take action. Brainstorm a list of ways in which boys and men can be empowered to curb abuse in their community and can become more involved in preventing rape. Also think about movements in South Africa: these may be local, national or global movements that are acting against rape. You will be asked to share some ideas at the beginning of the next class. 3. Read through the Homework Resource material 11.8.1 which highlights things we can do to protect ourselves and protect others. CONSOLIDATION 1. In the next lesson you are going to focus on action we can take to stop gender-based violence (GBV), especially rape. You will focus on what we can do to promote gender equality so that we can be active in stopping gender-based harm and violence. 2. Remember the core messages for this lesson: • I will choose if, and when, to have sex and when not to. • I have the right to say “no” to sexual attention and sex at any time. I also have the responsibility to respect, “no” for an answer. • I respect my own and others’ well-being. • I want to be part of a community that stops gender harm and violence and creates safety and peace in its place. Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 83 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 ASSESSMENT 1. Develop a slogan that could be used in your school’s programme for the national 16 Days of Activism for No Violence Against Women and Children. 2. Find one example taken from the media of how victims are often blamed for rape. Draft your own statement to correct this way of thinking about people who are raped. The statement could be for social media, a newspaper article, or even a slogan on a t-shirt. 3. Ask your peers what they think of your proposed activity. 4. RESOURCES/MATERIALS Reading 11.8.1: Rape17 Rape is a crime that is committed through a sexual act without the consent or agreement of both people involved. Rape is traumatic, humiliating and can have life-altering consequences. Rape is never the fault of the person who was raped. Rapists make the choice to rape and they are the ones blamed. Anyone can be raped, regardless of their gender, sexuality or age. Although women and girls are raped more often, boys and men can also get raped. Rape is an act of abuse of power. When rape is targeted against someone because of their sexual identity or race, it is a hate crime as well as an act of sexual violence. The law says a person is raped when another person forces any body part or object into their vagina or anus (sodomy), or their genital organs or into their mouth. It doesn’t matter if that person is someone’s friend, boyfriend or spouse. Nobody has the right to force themselves on another person. Rape causes many kinds of hurt, pain and damage to a victim’s life. Some forms of rape are not as easily recognised or not regarded as rape, but they are rape. A person can be raped by a stranger, by someone they know, or by someone they are going out with (date rape). A husband can also rape his wife. If someone is raped by two or more people at the same time, this is gang rape. A person who is drunk, asleep or unconscious is not able to consent to sex – if you have sex with a person who cannot consent, you are committing rape. Statutory rape is when someone aged 18 or older has sex with someone under the age of consent (16 years) whether or not he or she gave consent. It is considered statutory rape if a person who is 16 or 17 has consensual sex (sex with consent) with a younger person under the age of 16, when there is more than two years’ difference between their ages. When someone young is forced into a sexual act by someone they know it is often called sexual abuse and it is rape. Sexual abuse is more often committed by someone the person knows, than a stranger. This can be a family member, a caregiver, a neighbour or visitor, a religious leader or an educator. In every case, the abuser is abusing their power and committing an act of rape. 17 Adapted from: https://rapecrisis.org.za/get-help/ 84 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Rape in South Africa South Africa has one of the highest rates of rape in the world. Twelve times more women are raped and murdered in South Africa every year than in the United States. For every rape that is reported, many more acts of rape go unreported. That means there are many rapists who have not been brought to justice. Factors such as poverty and drug abuse do not explain this high rate of violence. South Africa’s “culture of violence” has many sources. One such source of violence is from the dehumanising apartheid system and the liberation struggle, where conflict was resolved through force, and men were imprisoned, forced into exile or conscription. Men are not to blame for history, but they have a responsibility to understand the current culture of violence and take personal action to stop it. This requires critical thinking about manhood, power and sex, and drawing clear lines that must not be crossed. As a nation, we need to examine other cultures of violence that exist in our society. We all have a responsibility to stop rape and change the culture of violence. Many government and civil society groups are campaigning to end rape, and many individuals are mobilising for change so that we can start to eliminate the negative effects of rape and other gender-based harm to our health and well-being – and to the health and well-being of our communities. In doing this we need to address unequal power relations and power inequality between genders in our families, communities, country – and in the world. By rejecting a culture of violence and domination, and demanding justice, our collective actions can stop rape. Worksheet 11.8.1: Beliefs about rape18 A. Say whether you agree or not to the following statements Agree Disagree 1. A woman who wears sexy clothing is partly to blame if she is raped 2. Alcohol and drug abuse can cause rape 3. If a man is aroused, it is very difficult for him to not have sex. 4. It is okay in a relationship if a woman does not want to have sex. 5. If a woman has been drinking with a man, he can expect to have sex with her. 6. If a man does a woman a favour, he is entitled to have sex with her. 7. A woman cannot be raped by her intimate partner or husband. 8. Only women can be raped or sexually abused. 9. Walking alone at night is asking for it. 10. If I see a friend pressuring someone to have sex, I should tell him to stop 11. The only one to blame for rape is the rapist 18 Adapted from: from A Community Mobilisation Training Manual for Preventing men’s use of violence against women. What Works to Prevent Violence, Sonke Gender Justice, WITS University. http://genderjustice.org.za/publication/community-mobilisation- training-manual-preventing-mens-use-violence-women/ Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 85 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 B. Write down in your books the motivations provided by your peers when they were reporting on whether they agree or not to the above statements. You could write your own motivation for your answers to summarise this activity. Reading 11.8.2: How to be a friend to someone who has been raped • Believe the rape victim when they say they have been raped and let them know you believe them. • The first thing you should say is, “This is not your fault. There is nothing you did to cause this. But you must seek help as soon as possible to ensure you are not hurt, pregnant or infected as a result of the rape.” • Do not make them feel that they were responsible for what the rapist did to them; for example, don’t ask why they were out late at night, what they were wearing, whether they had been drinking alcohol, whether they flirted with the rapist before the rape. This will make them feel they were somehow to blame. • Do not suggest that if the rape victim was able to persuade the rapist to use a condom, that she or he was not raped – rather affirm their strength in being able to do this. • Ask them how you can be of support and reassure them that you are there for them. • Offer to accompany him/her to get help. • If you are not sure, put yourself in their shoes – always consider how it would feel to have been through what they have experienced, and support them as you would want to be supported. Homework Resource for 11.8.1: Protecting ourselves, protecting others: changing the culture of violence19 What can I do to avoid being raped? Nobody ever asks to be raped but here are some safety tips that can help you avoid it. • Always be aware of what’s going on around you. • Walk with confidence. Hold your head upright. • If you’re going to a club or party, always take a friend you trust with you and keep an eye on one another. • Don’t go off alone or get sexual (even kissing) with someone you’ve just met. • Don’t get drunk or high at parties or clubs, especially not with people you don’t know or trust. • We can’t trust everyone we meet; so make people earn your trust over time, in a non-sexual setting. • Drink from bottles and cans that have not been tampered with. Insist on opening them yourself as so- called “date rape drugs” can be given to someone to make them powerless against a sexual assault or other crime. What both men and women and boys and girls need to understand • Date rape is a crime • Raping someone doesn’t make you cool. It’s something people who are morally and mentally sick do. • It doesn’t matter how much money you spend on a date, you’re not owed anything and “No!” still means “No!”. • Don’t think someone wants to have sex because of their behaviour or the way they are dressed, or because they agree to come to your room. A kiss doesn’t equal sex either. • If you have sex with someone who is high, has passed out, can’t say “No!” or is unaware of their surroundings you could be guilty of rape. • If your friends or peers are talking about women as objects, sexual conquests, or ways to pressure or force someone to have sex, speak up and challenge them. Remind them that no one is entitled to sex 19 Adapted from Rodwell, Bobby, The Date Rape Workbook, Nisaa Institute for Women’s Development, 2005 86 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 with somebody who doesn’t want it. What brings pleasure to one person should not hurt another person. • If you think you may have forced someone to have sex, get advice from an adult you trust to determine the steps you can take to assist the victim and get help for yourself. You can also call the rape crisis hotline. • Don’t be part of the culture of rape. What to do if you or someone you know is raped?20 Know Your Rights20 If you or someone you know has been raped, you have the right: • to be treated with fairness and with respect for your dignity and privacy • to offer information • to protection • to assistance • to compensation • to restitution • to legal advice If you or someone you know has been sexually assaulted: 1. Tell someone you trust and seek help immediately. 2. Health care: Seek medical help as quickly as you can. If you are injured, go straight to a hospital or health centre. Do not wash first: there may be hair, blood or semen on your body or clothes that can be used as evidence against the rapist. Medical attention within 72 hours is necessary to prevent infections and pregnancy. You can expect: • antiretroviral treatment (pills taken over a period of time) to prevent becoming HIV+, if the victim was HIV- before the rape • the morning after pill (MAP), also known as emergency contraception, to prevent a pregnancy • medicines to treat the possibility of having contracted any sexually transmitted infections (STIs) • counselling and support, plus screening for trauma 3. Police: if you want to report the rape, you should go to the police closest to where the attack took place. Bring someone with you (an adult you are close to, or a friend if you do not have an adult who can accompany you). You can report a rape, but you don’t have to lay a charge right away. The police usually keep forensic evidence for several months. 4. Emotional support: You are not to blame. Nothing that you said or did caused this to happen. But everyone who has been raped needs emotional support. It is best if you can get this from services that are experienced with sexual abuse and sexual assault. Remember, you are not alone, and do not have to face this alone. Get help as soon as you can, to start the healing process. 20 Rape Crisis Cape Town Trust. Retrieved: https://rapecrisis.org.za/get-help/ Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 87 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Here is a directory of services that you could consult should you need to call for support. The numbers are for the national call centres. Call and ask for the number for your local services. They will refer you to the appropriate centre in your province or region. PLACES THAT HELP A directory on services that can be approached for support Department of Social Development Gender-based Violence Call Centre: 0800 428 428 Dial *120*7867# (free from any cell phone). All child/gender-related violence and abuse questions and help for victims. Social workers available to assist. Stop Gender Violence Helpline: 0800 150 150 Childline: 0800 055 555 Lifeline South Africa: Free confidential telephone counselling services. 0861 322 322 www. lifeline.org.za Thuthuzela Care Centres: Find out if there is a Thuthuzela care centre in your area. For a list of TCCs visit the website http://isssasa.org.za/care-centres 88 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 GLOSSARY Age of consent: The age at which the law says you are old enough to agree to something. This can include agreeing to a health service, other services or to sexual activity. Consent: When someone agrees to something. When someone says “no” to something, it means they do not consent. If they are not sure that they agree it is not consent. If they say “yes” but then change their minds there is no longer consent. South Africa has laws about the age of consent to sexual activity. Gang rape: When a group of people rapes a person. Mutual respect When two people demonstrate that they value and admire one another, respect one another’s rights and their points of view. With mutual respect, you respect the other person’s feelings as well as their rights. Perpetrated: This means performed or carried out or enacted. A violent and harmful act can be perpetrated by one person against another person. In the case of rape, the rapist is the perpetrator. Rape: when someone forces their penis, fingers or object into someone’s vagina, anus, mouth or any other part of their body against their will. It does not matter if you are the person’s friend, boyfriend, fiancé or husband – or a stranger. Rape is an act of violence and it is a crime Rape culture, culture of violence: the attitudes, beliefs and myths in society that condone or excuse violence; these enable the thinking that someone could have done something to cause rape or make them deserve to be raped. Self-respect: When you value, look after and care for your own well-being, and you stand up for your rights. Sodomy: Anal penetration. If it is without consent, it is rape. Statutory rape: What the law says about sexual relations involving someone below the “age of consent”. People below the age of consent cannot legally consent to having sex. This means that someone who has sex with someone below the age of consent is doing something against the law. Victim-blaming: blaming someone who has been the victim of a crime instead of blaming the criminal. This is commonly what happens to rape victims. They are blamed for being raped. Victim-blaming is unfair and harmful, and it can cause stigma and self-stigma. No one EVER deserves to be raped. Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 89 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Lesson 11.9 Taking action against abuse 90 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Lesson 11.9 Taking action against abuse BRIEF LESSON SUMMARY In this lesson you will focus on both personal action as well as collective action to end gender-based violence (GBV). You will apply the knowledge and awareness developed in previous lessons and using your own creativity, you will plan actions for the campaign of 16 Days of Activism for No Violence Against Women and Children. In doing this, you will increase your knowledge, have an opportunity to examine your values, beliefs and attitudes around GBV, enhance your skills, in order to create effective messages and plan for group action. In Lesson 11.8’s homework and assessment tasks, you began to identify ways of taking action against any form of GBV, with a particular focus on rape. The activity in this lesson builds on ideas generated by you during and after Lesson 11.8, but focuses on planning for participation in an actual campaign. KEY POINTS 1. Rape is everyone’s problem. 2. Everyone is part of the solution to end GBV. 3. Each one of us can take practical steps to stop harmful behavior by not behaving in a harmful way ourselves and by supporting those who are being harmed. 4. There is power in numbers. We can get involved with others in campaigns and various efforts to end unequal power relations and GBV so that we can all live more peacefully at home, at school and in our communities. 5. Building relationships based on mutual respect and positive communication, along with being an activist for positive change, can go a long way to changing the culture of sexual violence in South Africa. ACTIVITIES Activity A: Talking the talk Introduction: The aim of this activity is to foster understanding across genders so that female learners develop insight into the perspective of male learners, and male learners develop insight into the perspective of female learners, about issues related to violence. This lesson will help you to build mutual empathy and assist you to find ways to better support each other, in order to prevent gender-based violence (GBV). 1. You will work in groups of 4-6, with both boys and girls in each group. To start this lesson, complete the first column only of Worksheet 11.9.1: Reflection on preventing sexual abuse on your own. You should include the ideas you wrote down in your homework from the last lesson. You will be sharing your responses with others in your group. This should take you five minutes. Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 91 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 2. Share your ideas with each other. Switch papers, giving boys a chance to read what girls have written and girls to read what boys have written, or you can take turns reading your lists to each other. 3. Within your small groups, discuss the following questions together: a. Think about the violence that we see in our daily lives. What do you see as the biggest challenge for your own sex when it comes to preventing sexual and GBV? What do you think about and what do you do in your own daily life to avoid it, if anything? What do you feel you can do to prevent violence in your own life? b. What do male students think men and boys should be doing to prevent violence in their community? What do female students think men and boys should be doing to prevent violence in their community? Learners should bring in ideas from the homework they did after the last lesson. c. What should everyone be doing to ensure violence against LGBTQIA people is not forgotten? 4. Complete the second column. You should take a few minutes to think about it on your own, and you can then consult with each other in your groups for ideas. This should take you about five minutes. 5. In the large group, discuss your experience in this lesson by asking yourself whether you learnt anything new from someone of another gender that you had not considered before. What was surprising for you? Activity B: “Walking the walk” to prevent sexual abuse: getting ready for action Introduction: The purpose of this activity is to prepare for 16 Days of Activism for No Violence Against Women and Children. 1. What do you think the meaning of the term, “collective action” is? 2. The purpose of this activity is for you to get yourselves organised in order to participate in activities related to 16 Days of Activism for No Violence Against Women and Children. While the name suggests this is to protect women and children, the aim is really to include sexual and GBV against anyone, including men, boys and the LGBTQIA community. 3. Have you participated in any activities organised for 16 Days of Activism for No Violence Against Women and Children? Share your experiences. 4. Brainstorm, as a class, what activities you are aware of that are being planned for this year, and organisations that work to stop violence. Put your responses on the board or on flipchart paper. 21 NOTE TO LEARNERS21 The 16 Days of Activism for No Violence Against Women and Children Campaign starts on 25 November and ends on 10 December every year. The 16 days include World AIDS Day on 1 December and International Human Rights Day on 10 December. The campaign’s goal is to raise awareness about GBV and child abuse and find practical ways to stop them. If you have internet access, look here for more details: https://www.parliament.gov.za/ project-event-details/3 21 Retrieved: https://www.parliament.gov.za/project-event-details/3 92 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 5. This is the final activity for the Grade 11 Sexuality Education lessons. It is to plan to participate in 16 Days of Activism for No Violence Against Women and Children, if feasible. Your plans could include an activity for the school or school community or engaging in other local or national activities. You will be developing your own campaign activities in Grade 12. For this lesson the focus will be on 16 Days of Activism for No Violence Against Women and Children. For the remainder of the time in class, and then for homework, you will continue to work on planning an action. 6. Divide into groups of up to 8 people. You can select your own groups, based on your ability to work together on planning outside of class. 7. Refer to Worksheet 11.9.2 in the assessment activity. Use the criteria to guide your planning and discussions for your campaigns. Work in groups to complete the template plans for your campaigns. 8. By the end of the lesson your group must have an initial action plan to participate in the 16 Days of Activism for No Violence Against Women and Children campaign. You will continue to plan outside of class for homework. If you would like to carry out the activities you plan, explain the options you have identified in your advance preparation. You can also consider any actions you identify during or after this session. 9. Refer to Reading 11.9.1: Knowing the facts about sexual violence in South Africa in your learner books. In order for social action and campaigns to be effective, activities should be based on information. Thus you should include facts, statistics and real life experience. Work in your groups to review this reading and the lessons before it, and brainstorm key facts that you feel are important to highlight in a campaign against sexual and GBV. You can divide the work between you to work efficiently. Share a few key points you would like to highlight. HOMEWORK Complete your plans as required for this lesson. You can choose to further develop these plans into a full campaign in Grade 12. CONSOLIDATION Make sure you make appropriate arrangements for your campaign actions. Remember that you should pay close attention to any activities around the 16 Days of Activism for No Violence Against Women and Children campaign. It will be valuable learning for the first lesson in Grade 12. If it is not feasible to implement the activities you have planned, remember that this was still an important opportunity for you to think through actions you can take to end violence in your community. Consolidate the lesson with the key points in the lesson. Re-examine the core messages below. Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 93 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Core Messages • I want to be part of a community that stops gender harm and violence and creates safety and peace in its place. • I will choose if and when to have sex, or not. • I have the right to say “no” and the responsibility to respect “no” to sexual attention and sex at any time and in any situation. • I respect my own and others’ well-being. ASSESSMENT 1. Use the following template to plan anti-violence campaign activities, which will assist you to select content, structure your activities, and identify what methods you would want to use in a possible campaign. 2. Use the worksheet to self-assess your progress and add your own feedback as well. Done √ Criteria Your planning (or not) What is the objective or goal of your campaign? What is the topic and/or message you want to bring? Who is your target audience? What is the response you would like to get from your target audience? What ideas do you want your target audience to understand? How much time will you need for the activity you are planning? What resources will you need (e.g. time, materials, and money if needed)? Which medium will you use to promote your message (e.g. poster, song, play etc.)? Which communication channels or media will you use? Is there any other planning you think your group may need? 94 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 RESOURCES/MATERIALS Worksheet 11.9.1: Reflection on preventing sexual abuse What can I do to prevent sexual abuse and What can WE do to prevent sexual abuse gender based violence? and gender based violence? In my own life What should men and women do together? With friends What should women and girls do together? In my community What should men and boys do with their peers? Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 95 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Reading 11.9.1: Knowing the facts about sexual violence in South Africa Unless we take action together...22 This does not have to continue! Through collective action, we can put an end to the epidemic of violence in South Africa. The South African Medical Research Council and the Centre for Public Mental Health conducted research on intimate partner violence (IPV). The research tells us23: 1. IPV is the most common form of violence experienced by South African women. 2. More women are killed by their current or former intimate male partner in South Africa than in any other country in the world. 3. Victims remain hesitant to disclose their experience of IPV because of stigma. Those who do report incidents say public servants fail to detect their problem or deny that it exists. 4. Among pregnant women, 36-40% experience physical IPV and 15-19% experience sexual IPV. The violence puts the baby at risk. 22 Soul City Institute for Social Change (2016). From We want to be free – A book about gender-based violence. 23 Nhlapo, Zongile. 5 Shocking Facts About Intimate Partner Violence in South Africa (2017) Retrieved: ttp://www.huffingtonpost. co.za/2017/05/12/5-shocking-facts-about-intimate-partner-violence-insouth-africa_a_22083035/ 96 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 It is important to recognise the signs of abuse in your relationship and to do something about it early on. Early signs of abuse could be emotional, for example your partner says mean things about you in front of friends, family or strangers. Another early sign is isolation. Your partner may try to control what you do and keep you away from people who are supportive of you.24 Alcohol abuse is a big contributor to increased levels of both GBV and HIV infection. Alcohol abuse very often leads to violence. It can also leads to risky sexual behaviour like inconsistent condom use; coercive sex or rape; multiple sexual partners, which puts people at risk for STIs (including HIV) and unintended pregnancy; behaviour that causes guilt and regret, and emotional distress. But remember, rape is not caused by alcohol. It is caused by a rapist. 25 26 25 26 24 Soul City Institute for Social Change (2016). From We want to be free – A book about gender-based violence. 25 Government of South Africa. Retrieved: https://www.flickr.com/photos/governmentza/36079541780/ 26 Government of South Africa. Retrieved: https://www.flickr.com/photos/governmentza/36079541950/ Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 97 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Although the facts about sexual violence in South Africa are hard to learn about, there are things we can do to prevent sexual violence from occurring. The following illustration27 shows us that tolerance of things that some think is “no big deal” like catcalling, can lead to tolerance of more serious acts of violence, like sexual violence. We do not have to tolerate behaviour and relationships that lead to violence. If you see something, say something Start the conversation today. Building relationships based on mutual respect and positive communication, along with being an activist for positive change can go a long way to changing the culture of sexual violence in South Africa.28 29 27 11th Principle: Consent! Rape Culture Pyramid, version 4 http://www.11thprincipleconsent.org/consent-propaganda/rape- culture-pyramid/ accessed April 26, 2018. 28 Photo Credit: International Transport Workers Federation (2010). Retrieved: https://www.flickr.com/photos/itf/13216281674/in/ photostream/ 29 Photo Credit: Shipyard Productions for Say No-UNiTE (2014). Retrieved: https://www.flickr.com/photos/ saynotoviolence/8406071525/in/photostream/ 98 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Worksheet 11.9.2: Planning an activity for 16 Days of Activism for No Violence Against Women and Children Done √ Criteria Your planning (or not) What is the objective or goal of your campaign? What is the topic and/or message you want to bring? Who is your target audience? What is the response you would like to get from your target audience? What ideas do you want your target audience to understand? How much time will you need for the activity you are planning? What resources will you need (e.g. time, materials, and money if needed)? Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 99 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Which medium will you use to promote your message (e.g. poster; song; play etc.)? Which communication channels or media will you use? Is there any other planning you think your group may need? GLOSSARY Activism: Taking action to bring about social or political change. Activists get involved with a cause they feel strongly about, often in relation to a social justice issue, unmet needs, or environmental justice. Actions may include speaking out, or organising others to take action. Collective action: Working together for social change. A group can have more impact than individuals working alone. Many groups working together at different levels have even greater power for social change – the combined efforts of many working to address the same need are referred to as ‘collective action’. Femicide: The murder of a female partner (including transgender women). Gender-based violence (GBV): When someone acts violently against someone else because of their gender, this is gender-based violence. The most common type of GBV we think of is physical violence. But violence is not only physical. Violence can also be also emotional, financial, psychological and verbal. Gender-based harm: This is a term used to describe the results of harmful acts that are based on gender, such as sexual harassment. Intimate partner violence (IPV): Any form of violence that happens within an intimate, sexual or romantic relationship. Mutual empathy: To understand and share the feelings of another as if they were your own feelings. Mutual empathy is when two persons learn from each other’s perspective in order to better support each other. Personal action: something that you commit to doing because you know it is the right thing to do. It may be to protect yourself, protect others, or something you decide to do to make a difference to your life or the lives of others. 100 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 BIBLIOGRAPHY 11th Principle: Consent! Rape Culture Pyramid, version 4. Retrieved: http://www.11thprincipleconsent.org/ consent-propaganda/rape-culture-pyramid/. Cameron, E. (2014). Justice: A Personal Account. Tafelberg. Chandra, J., & Cervix, R. (2018). Rape Culture Pyramid - 11th Principle: Consent! Retrieved December 5, 2018, from http://www.11thprincipleconsent.org/consent-propaganda/rape-culture-pyramid/ Choose Respect - Code of Behaviour. (2004). Retrieved December 5, 2018, from http://www.chooserespect. org.au/code_of_behaviour.html Daniels, N. (2018). Semenya to challenge ‘discriminatory’ testosterone rule. Jacaranda FM. Retrieved De- cember 5, 2018, from https://www.jacarandafm.com/news/news/semenya-challenge-discriminatory-tes- tosterone-rule/ de Oliveira, T. and Kharsany, A., et al. (2017). Transmission networks and risk of HIV infection in KwaZulu- Natal, South Africa: a community-wide phylogenetic study. The Lancet HIV, 4(1), e41–e50. Dey, K., Shiralee, M., & Sarah, S. (2015) The Road to Recovery: You & Rape. Rape Crisis Cape Town Trust. Re- trieved from https://rapecrisis.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/English.pdf Erin. (2014). Relationship Rights & Responsibilities. Respect Me. Vocational Partnerships Group (VPG). Re- trieved December 5, 2018, from http://www.respectme.org.au/relationship-rights-responsibilities/ Government Communication and Information System. (2017). 2017 National Women’s Day [photograph]. Retrieved from https://www.flickr.com/photos/governmentza/36079541950/ Highway Mail. Retrieved: https://highwaymail.co.za/243218/living-positively-7-famous-people-liv- ing-with-hivaids/ International Transport Workers’ Federation. (2010). Violence Against Women March in Ghana [photograph]. Retrieved from https://www.flickr.com/photos/itf/13216281674/in/photostream/ Joyner, K., Rees, K., & Honikman, S. (2015). Intimate Partner Violence (IPV) in South Africa: How to break the vicious cycle. Retrieved from http://www.sun.ac.za/english/faculty/healthsciences/Documents/ News/2016/IPV_policybrief 12 01 15 final.pdf Krienert, J. L., & Walsh, J. A. (2011). Sibling Sexual Abuse: An Empirical Analysis of Offender, Victim, and Event Characteristics in National Incident-Based Reporting System (NIBRS) Data, 2000–2007. Journal of Child Sexual Abuse, 20(4), 353–372. https://doi.org/10.1080/10538712.2011.588190 Living Positively: 7 famous people living with HIV/Aids (2016). Highway Mail. Retrieved December 5, 2018, from https://highwaymail.co.za/243218/living-positively-7-famous-people-living-with-hivaids/ Masters, William H., Johnson, Virginia E. (1966). Human Sexual Response. Toronto; New York: Bantam Books. Nhlapo, Z. (2017). 5 Shocking Facts About Intimate Partner Violence In South Africa. HuffPost South Africa. Retrieved December 5, 2018, from https://www.huffingtonpost.co.za/2017/05/12/5-shocking-facts-about- intimate-partner-violence-in-south-africa_a_22083035/ Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: 101 Scripted Lesson Plans

Learner Book: Grade 11 Rodwell, B. (2005). Date Rape Campaign. Nisaa Institute for Women’s Development. Shipyard Productions. (2012). Ride On! Speak Out! Unite to End Violence against Women and Girls [photo- graph]. Retrieved from https://www.flickr.com/photos/saynotoviolence/8406071525/in/photostream/ Shisana, O., Rehle, T., Simbayi L.C., Zuma, K., Jooste, S., Zungu N., Labadarios, D., Onoya, D. et al. (2014) South African National HIV Prevalence, Incidence and Behaviour Survey, 2012. Cape Town, HSRC Press. Soccer star reveals his HIV status. (2014). Drum. Retrieved December 5, 2018, from https://www.news24. com/Drum/Archive/soccer-star-reveals-his-hiv-status-20170728 Sonke Gender Justice, WITS University (n.d.). A Community Mobilisation Training Manual for Preventing Men’s Use of Violence Against Women. Soul City Institute for Social Justice. (2016). Kwanele! A training manual for community radio stations – developing content on gender-based violence. Soul City Institute for Social Justice. (2016). We want to be free free – A book about gender-based violence. The SANAC website (http://ivizard.org/sanac/viz/) The Shukumisa Coalition & The Young Urban Women Programme. (2016). Improving after-rape care services. Transactional Sex. (n.d.). MTV Shuga. MTV Staying Alive Foundation. Retrieved December 5, 2018, from https://www.mtvshuga.com/downsouth/topics/transactional-sex/ Wilson, P.M. (1999). Session 16: Masturbation and Other Sexual Behaviors. Our Whole Lives : Sexuality Education For Grades 7-9. Boston: Unitarian Universalist Association. Reprinted by permission of the Unitarian Universalist Association. Zackie Achmat, TIME hero. (2003). Brand South Africa. Retrieved December 5, 2018, from https://www. brandsouthafrica.com/people-culture/people/achmataccolade 102 Sexuality Education in Life Orientation: Scripted Lesson Plans

These workbooks have been developed for the children of South Africa under the leadership of the Minister of Basic Education, Mrs Angie Motshekga , and the Deputy Minister of Basic Education, Mr Enver Surty. The Sexuality Education in Life Orientation Scripted Lesson Plans form part of the Department of Basic Education’s range of interventions aimed at improving As one of the priorities of the Government’s Plan of Action, this project has been made possible by the Mrs Angie Motshekga, generous funding of the United States Agency for Minister of Basic Education International Development (USAID). This has enabled the Department to make these workbooks, in English, available at no cost . We hope that teachers will find these workbooks useful in their everyday teaching and in ensuring that their learners cover the curriculum. We have taken care to guide the teacher through each of the activities by the inclusion of icons that indicate what it is that the learner should do. We sincerely hope that children will enjoy working through the book as they grow and learn, and that you, the teacher, will share their pleasure. We wish you and your learners every success in using Mr Enver Surty, Deputy these workbooks. Minister of Basic Education ISBN: 978-1-4315-3318-3 9 781431 533183